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Next Friday (2000) movie script

by Ice Cube.

More info about this movie on IMDb.com
EXT. FRONT LAWN - OVERHEAD SHOT - NIGHT

DEBO is laid out on the grass.

		CRAIG (V.O.)
	In the movies, when you beat up the
	neighborhood bully; you suppose to live
	happily ever after.  But around here;
	that's when all the drama begins...

Blue and red police lights flash over Debo's body.  Two
sheriffs walk INTO OUR FRAME and stand over Debo.  They flash
their lights on him.

		CRAIG (cont'd) (V.O.)
	Last Friday; I got fired for the first
	time.  I got high for the first time.  I
	got shot at for the first time and I
	kicked Debo's ass for the first time...

They get him to his feet; but he stumbles and falls in the
bushes like a knocked out prize fighter.  The sheriffs laugh
at him.

Debo looks dazed and confused.  The sheriffs help him out the
bushes and start to cuff him.

		CRAIG (cont'd) (V.O.)
	I was the man that night; and Debo ended
	up going to jail for a couple of years.
	But he told Ezal he was getting out next
	Friday.  He said, when he see me, he was
	gonna smoke me on the spot...

They walk him OUT OF FRAME...

						FADE TO BLACK.

						OVER BLACK:

		CRAIG (cont'd) (V.O.)
	And today is next Friday...

SOUNDTRACK!

"New Line Cinema presents, etc., etc...

FADE IN:

EXT. LOS ANGELES - EARLY MORNING

OPENING CREDITS.  It's early Friday morning and the sun peeks
over the LA skyline.  As the city starts to awake and the
credits continue to roll;
we see SEVERAL SHOTS of the real people who make up Los
Angeles.  It seems that they all move to the same beat.

EXT. L.A. COUNTY JAIL - CONTINUOUS

Debo is released from the Twin Towers County Jail.  Still in
his orange jumpsuit, he walks right past us and down the
street.  Everybody clears his path.

SOUNDTRACK still PUMPIN'.

Debo crosses the street passing an old man dancing and
directing traffic.  Debo stops, the man starts to dance in
front of him.  He stares for a second, then he's on his way.

Still walking tall and hard, he trips over a crack in the
sidewalk (losing cool points).

Three little black girls in plaid uniforms practice the
latest dance steps on their way to school.  Debo is walking
towards them.  They scream and take off in the other
direction.  He smiles.  Briefly.

Still walking; he stops at a corner.  A SA boy waits to cross
with his low-rider bike.  A Metrolink train passes.  After it
goes by; we see Debo riding off on the boy's bike.  He's on
the ground holding his eye.

Debo continues to ride through the city.

He turns a corner or two and comes to a stop at Craig's
house.

EXT. JONES' HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

Mr. Jones' dog catcher's truck sits in front of the house.

A CHIHUAHUA (like the Taco Bell dog) takes a dump on the
lawn.  It starts to BARK at Debo.  He looks down at the dog
and kicks him in the street.  The DOG YIPES!

Debo focuses his attention on Craig's house.

INT. JONES' HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

The hallway is clear and quiet, until MR. JONES (Craig's
father), storms out of the bedroom.  He struggles to put on
his dog catcher's uniform.  He stops at the bathroom door and
knocks hard.

		MR. JONES
	Craig!  Craig!  Off yo' ass and on yo'
	feet; this ain't the time to beat your
	meat!

Mr. Jones laughs at himself.

		CRAIG (O.S.)
	I'll be out in about 35-40 minutes!

		MR. JONES
	Hurry up; today is Fri-day!  And we gotta
	hit the high-way!

Mr. Jones continues on his way; dancing to the beat.

INT. BATHROOM - CLOSE-UP ON HIGH TIMES MAGAZINE - CONTINUOUS

Hands crack open a $20 sack of bud onto the magazine.  A pack
of Zigzags fall INTO FRAME.  Papers are ripped from the
package.

CLOSE UP ON CRAIG JONES

the doctor of this delicate operation.

		CRAIG (V.O.)
	Soon as my pops found out what Debo said
	to Ezal, he wanted me to move with my
	uncle and little cousin in Rancho
	Cucamonga.  Til' things calm down, or
	Debo went back to prison.  Whichever
	comes first.

He's sitting on the toilet (dressed: not using it) putting
the finishing touches on his masterpiece.  He licks, rolls
and slides the 'J into the fifth pocket on his Levi jeans.

		CRAIG (cont'd) (V.O.)
	I feel like the biggest punk around here.
	I wiped Debo's ass.  He should be the one
	moving.

He exits.

EXT. JONES' HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

The front door opens.  Mr. Jones walks out the door, yelling
back into the house.

		MR. JONES
	Craig!  Let's go!  I don't wanna hit that
	traffic.

He steps off the porch backwards and into "fresh Chihuahua
shit."  He slips and falls on the grass.

		MR. JONES (cont'd)
	I be got damn.

Mr. Jones gets up.  He brushes the grass off his uniform.  He
looks clean, but when he turns around dog shit is smashed all
over his back and butt.

		MR. JONES (cont'd)
	Craig!  Craig!

Craig emerges from the house with his bags in hand.

		CRAIG
		(irritated)
	Here I come!

		MR. JONES
		(still mad)
	Well bring yo' ass on...

Craig slams the door and starts towards the truck.

		CRAIG
	What's the matter?

		MR. JONES
	I fell in some mud.  Now hurry up!

Mr. Jones gets in the truck.  Craig jumps in.  They back out
and pull off.

INT. DOG TRUCK - MOVING - CLOSE-UP ON CRAIG - CONTINUOUS

He's daydreaming about Smokey.

		CRAIG (V.O.)
	I didn't wanna leave my neighborhood at
	all.  Especially my homeboy Smokey.  But
	he went to rehab last week.  I know I'mma
	miss him...

Out of nowhere, Debo jumps in front of the truck.  Mr. Jones
slams on the BRAKES.

		DEBO
	Craig!  Get out the car, boy!  This the
	rematch!

Debo reaches for his shank.  Craig turns to Mr. Jones!

		CRAIG
	Daddy, punch it!

Mr. Jones floors it and hits Debo.  He falls over the hood,
off the car and in the street.  The yellow truck speeds off.

Debo jumps up staggering with scrapes and bruises.

		DEBO
	You know I'mma find you!  You can run ya'
	can't hide!

BACK IN CAR - CONTINUOUS

Craig screams out the window.

		CRAIG
	You fake ass Suge Knight!

Mr. Jones is a bit shaken up.

		MR. JONES
	That nigga worst than them damn pit
	bulldogs or something!  That's why moving
	wit'cha Uncle Elroy and Cousin Day-Day is
	the best thing for you right now.

		CRAIG
		(with attitude)
	Ya'll making me look like a punk.

		MR. JONES
	It ain't about being a punk, son.  It's
	about this...

Craig smells something in the air.

		MR. JONES (cont'd)
	My great, great grand daddy on my Momma
	side; had a saying... 'See a fool --
	leave a fool.'  Somebody else a get him.
	Plus, I don't want that fool shooting at
	my house trying to hit yo' ass.

		CRAIG
	What's that smell?

Mr. Jones sniffs.

		MR. JONES
	Must be your upper lip, 'cause I don't
	smell nothing.

		CRAIG
		(holding his nose)
	I do.

		MR. JONES
	What it smell like?

		CRAIG
	Smells like you didn't fall in no mud.

Mr. Jones grabs the air freshener from under the seat.  He
starts to spray too much.  Craig's window won't roll down.

		CRAIG (cont'd)
	What's wrong with the window?

		MR. JONES
	I gotta get'em fixed.  They don't roll
	down.

		CRAIG
	All damn.

		MR. JONES
	Just hold your breath.

EXT. CITY OF RANCHO CUCAMONGA - MORNING

They exit the freeway and pass a sign that reads, "Rancho
Cucamonga" (the city away from the city).

EXT. UNCLE ELROY'S STREET - CONTINUOUS

Welcome to the suburbs.  Where the "Smiley Happy People" live
in peace and quiet.

The neighborhood is full of green lawns and nice two story
track homes as far as the eye can see.  The yellow truck
drives through the streets and pulls up to a cul-de-sac.  Mr.
Jones BLOWS the HORN.

		MR. JONES
	Nice neighborhood, huh?

		CRAIG
	It's alright.

		MR. JONES
	18-years of chasing dogs; and my lazy ass
	brother hits the lotto his first time
	playing.  I still can't figure that one
	out.

		CRAIG
	Why they got to have the loudest house on
	the block!

Uncle Elroy's house is royal blue with gold trim.  All the
other houses are painted in earth tones.

		MR. JONES
	Ah, son, don't be no hater.  You know
	your uncle ain't got no taste.  Just
	don't let him rub off on you.

Craig grabs his bags.

		CRAIG
	You coming in?

		MR. JONES
	No, I'mma go on to work.  I don't wanna
	hear Elroy's mouth.  Now listen to me,
	Craig.  It's gonna be different living
	over here.  Don't let your uncle and your
	cousin get you into no shit.  Understand?

		CRAIG
	Hey, Pops, I'm grown.  Can't nobody get
	me in trouble no more.

As craig gets out;  the front door flies open.  It's DAY-DAY
(22), Craig's crazy younger cousin.  He yells back into the
house.

		DAY-DAY
	Daddy, Craig is here.

Day-Day walks out to the car and gives Craig a pound.

		CRAIG
	What's crackin'?

		DAY-DAY
	You.  Hi, Uncle Willie.

		MR. JONES
	Hey, Day-Day.  Where's yo' big head
	father?

		DAY-DAY
	There he is.

Just then, UNCLE ELROY (42) hits the door.  Dressed in boxers
and a T-shirt.  This is Mr. Jones' (very loud) little
brother.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Hey, Debo, heard you running from a ass-
	whippin'?

		CRAIG
	Naw, it ain't like that.

		UNCLE ELROY
	If you see that boy again, bite off his
	ear off like Mike Tyson.

		CRAIG
	Alright, I'll remember that.

		UNCLE ELROY
	You know me?  I would've shot his big
	ass.
		(peeking into the ear)
	Hey, Willie, how's it going?  Still
	steppin' in dog shit every day?

Uncle Elroy laughs.  Mr. Jones isn't amused.

		MR. JONES
	Make sure you look after my son out here.
	Don't get him involved with none of your
	bullshit, Roy.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Don't worry 'bout nothin', big bro.  He
	in the best fuckin' hands in Rancho
	Chocomunga, baby!  This my world, you
	just a nigga late paying rent.  Ain't
	that right, nephew?

Uncle Elroy hugs Craig by the arm.

		MR. JONES
	Craig, remember what I told you.

		CRAIG
	I'll remember.

Mr. Jones pulls off.  Uncle Elroy yells out to him.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Send Betty my love.
		(to Craig)
	Boy you looking good.
		(grabbing his bags)
	I'mma take these in the house for you,
	man... and when you finish with this cat,
	come inside.  I got something to show
	you.

		CRAIG
	Thanks, Unc.

Uncle Elroy starts towards to the house.

		DAY-DAY
	You know it's been over a year since we
	kicked it last?  Up at the family
	reunion.

		CRAIG
	I know, that's when Uncle Elroy cussed
	out everybody, and threw up in Aunt
	Faye's backseat.

Day-Day laughs.

		DAY-DAY
	Yep.  I forgot about him cussin' out
	everybody.  Damn that was fun.

		CRAIG
	I know, we had a good time.  But ever
	since you guys moved out here, it seems
	like we've lost touch.

		DAY-DAY
	I know; this a long way from Watts.  But
	what I like about living out here is that
	you don't hear no helicopters, no sirens,
	no drive-by's, no nothing.  Just peace
	and quiet.  Listen.

They do.  It is quiet, except for a few BIRDS SINGING.

		DAY-DAY (cont'd)
	Shit sound good, huh?

Just then, a maroon Cadillac low-rider on Daytons rolls up
the block.  It's the Jokers: JOKER (28), LI'L JOKER (21) and
BABY JOKER (15).  They pull into their driveway.

		DAY-DAY (cont'd)
	Aw damn.

In SLOW MOTION: One by one they get out the car.  They have a
dog with them named "Cheeco."  As they get to the front door
they all look over at Craig and Day-Day.

Day-Day looks away, while Craig keeps his eye on them.  They
disappear inside.

		CRAIG
	Who is that?

		DAY-DAY
	Joker, he just got out of the pen.  Li'l
	Joker, he just got out of Youth
	Authority.  And Baby Joker, he just got
	out of Juvenile Hall.

		CRAIG
	They ever let you hit the switches on
	that Cadillac?

		DAY-DAY
	Naw, them dudes is assholes.  Especially
	that dog - Cheeco.  Watch this little
	ass, he's sneaky.  Plus, I got something
	better than a Cadillac.

They walk over to his black BMW 325i on chrome rims.

		CRAIG
	This you?

		DAY-DAY
		(proud)
	Yeah, that's me.  Just a little somethin'
	somethin' I picked up.

		CRAIG
	Must be nice.  I wish we won the lottery.
	Come up on a million dollars like ya'll.

		DAY-DAY
	Man, after taxes, lawyer fees, and paying
	off my daddy's bad credit, we didn't end
	up with a million.  We bought this house
	and I spent the rest on this.  It's the
	bomb, huh?

		CRAIG
	This my baby.  I feel like a new nigga in
	this car.  I get mo' phone numbers
	rollin' this, than I ever did on the bus.

		MISS HO KYM (O.S.)
	Hi, Day-Day!

They turn to spot MISS HO KYM (67), the old Korean lady who
lives next door.  She's sitting on her porch nursing a cup of
coffee.

		DAY-DAY
		(speaking louder and slower)
	Hi, Mulan.

		MISS HO KYM
	Fuck you, Day-Day.  Who's ya boy?

		DAY-DAY
	This my cousin, Craig.  He just moved out
	here from L.A.  Craig, this is Miss Ho.

Day-Day smiles at Craig.

		MISS HO KYM
	My name is Miss Ho Kym.  Day-Day just
	trying to be a smart ass.  Nice to meet
	you, Craig.  Are you 'bout it, 'bout it?

		CRAIG
	Excuse me?

		MISS HO KYM
	I said...are you 'bout it, 'bout it --
	rowdy, rowdy?

Craig can't believe his ears.

		CRAIG
	Yeah, I'm 'bout it.

		MISS HO KYM
	Well, then, it's all good.  Yo, Day-Day,
	something is going down with those
	Mexicans across the street?  I've been
	seeing a lot of activity.

They all look over at the Joker's house.

		CRAIG
	What kind of activity?

		MISS HO KYM
	Strange activity.  I think they running
	drugs off Tijuana.  Day-Day don't believe
	me.

		DAY-DAY
	How do you know for sure?

		MISS HO KYM
	I know everything, playboy.  Don't hate,
	congratulate.

		DAY-DAY
	I don't have time, Miss Ho, I'll see you
	later.

Day-Day and Craig start to walk back to the house.

		MISS HO KYM
	See you later, Day-Day.  Come by after
	work, I got the John Blaze shit for you.

		CRAIG
	Nice to meet you?

		MISS HO KYM
	Peace out, Craig.

INT. UNCLE ELROY'S HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

Day-Day and Craig enter the house.  They still have the
furniture from the projects.  Craig looks around.  He spots
at a few hanging pictures.

		CRAIG
	Man, this a cool house.

		DAY-DAY
		(picking up a picture)
	Thanks, I just wish my mother had a
	chance to see it.

Mother's picture: she looks like Day-Day with a wig on.
She's smiling and holding the winning lotto ticket.

		DAY-DAY (cont'd)
	But when she found out we won the money,
	she had a heart attack.  You know the
	story.

		CRAIG
	Yeah.

A sad moment.

		DAY-DAY
	Go on and make yourself at home.  I'mma
	go get dressed for work.

		CRAIG
	Oh, yeah, where you work at?

		DAY-DAY
	Pinky's Records and Disc in the shopping
	center.  I'mma talk to my boss and see if
	he got a little position for you.  'Cause
	you been unemployed for a long time now,
	Craig.

		CRAIG
	Thanks for reminding me.

Day-Day exits.  Craig is left to look around, until something
outside catches his eye.

EXT. HOUSE

It's D'WANA (20), Day-Day's six-month pregnant girlfriend.
She's walking on the right side of his BMW.  With one hand
she waves at Craig...with the other hand she's keying Day-
Day's car with the skills of a retarded first-grader.

INT. HOUSE

Craig waves back, but something ain't right.  Uncle Elroy
steps in with SUGA (39), his nymphomaniac girlfriend.  She's
wearing a sexy nightie that's a size too small.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Craig, I want you to meet my old lady,
	Suga.  Suga, this is Craig.

		SUGA
	Oooh, ba-by!

She gives Craig a big, juicy hug and kiss, grabbing his ass
in the process.

		SUGA (cont'd)
		(hugging and grabbing)
	You even cuter than your baby pictures.

		CRAIG
	Thank you.

		SUGA
		(whispering in Craig's ear)
	You know, I'mma be your new auntie.  We
	can keep it all in the family if you want
	to.

Uncle Elroy un-hugs them.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Okay, okay, that's enough.  Go put on
	some damn clothes.

		SUGA
		(pouting)
	Elroy.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Suga.  Go ahead and get us something to
	smoke on.

		SUGA
	Okay.
		(winking)
	Bye, Craig.

		CRAIG
	Nice to meet you.

Suga walks out.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Man, that girl's gonna kill me one day.
	Viagra ain't working.  My back keep going
	out... she don't never get enough.  But
	check this out.  I got to lay some ground
	rules.
		(gets closer to Craig)
	Your my family and I love you.  You're
	welcome to anything you want in my home.
	But I don't wanna catch you in the
	refrigerator or in my Suga bowl... you
	feel me knocking?

		CRAIG
	Yeah.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Well, let me in.

		CRAIG
	Uncle Elroy, who's that girl by Day-Day's
	car?

He looks.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Oh, that's D'Wana.  His ex.
		(yelling upstairs)
	Day-Day, the crazy bitch is back!

Day-Day runs down the stairs to get a look.  He's holding a
piece of paper.

		DAY-DAY
	Aw, naw.

He runs out the door.

EXT. HOUSE

D'Wana continues her job.  Day-Day storms over, waving the
paper.

		DAY-DAY
	Girl, you supposed to be 1000 feet from
	my house.  What you doing over here?

		D'WANA
	What it look like I'm doing?  You can't
	quit me, I'm pregnant!

		DAY-DAY
	That ain't my baby!

Day-Day spots the damage.  He loses it.

		DAY-DAY (cont'd)
		(in disbelief)
	Oh, my God!  What you doing?!

Now he's a madman.

		DAY-DAY (cont'd)
	Bitch!  You keyed my car!  I'mma kill
	you!

Day-Day charges D'Wana.  She has her pepper spray ready.

		D'WANA
	I got your bitch right here.

D'Wana sprays his face orange.  He stops in his tracks; grabs
his eyes and screams like a woman.

		DAY-DAY
	Awwwww....
		(staggering)
	Awwwww....

		D'WANA
	I expect you to return all phone calls
	and take me to lunch today.  I'll be back
	out here on my break.  Nobody quits me.

D'Wana runs to her car.  She speeds off.  Uncle Elroy goes
for the water hose.  Craig grabs Day-Day.

		DAY-DAY
	I can't see!  I can't see!  Daddy!

		CRAIG
	Lay down, Day-Day.  Stop moving.

Craig puts him on the grass.

		DAY-DAY
	She pepper-sprayed me, man!  She pepper-
	sprayed me!

		CRAIG
	I know, be still.

Before he can say another word, Uncle Elroy nearly drowns him
with the water hose.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Boy, you got you a little fatal
	attraction, huh?  I had two or three of
	them in my day.

Day-Day is drowning.

		UNCLE ELROY (cont'd)
	Craig, I hope you know how to deal with
	women better than this fool.

Craig moves the hose.

		CRAIG
	That's too much water.

Now Day-Day is blind and choking.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Help him to his feet.  Let's get him to
	the bathroom.

They get him up and into the house.

INT. BATHROOM - CONTINUOUS

They rush Day-Day into the shower.

		DAY-DAY
		(confused)
	Hold on.  What you doing?

Uncle Elroy turns on the cold water.  Day-Day screams.  He
tries to get out.  They push him back in.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Wet your eyes, boy.  Stay in there for
	about 20 minutes.

		DAY-DAY
	20 minutes?

		UNCLE ELROY
	Yeah, 20 minutes.  Trust me.  I've been
	pepper sprayed nine times.  20 minutes.

Uncle Elroy slams the door.  Day-Day stands in the shower
fully dressed and soaking wet.

		UNCLE ELROY (cont'd)
	Let me show you my back yard.  You know
	it's bigger than y'all back yard.

They exit, leaving Day-Day in the shower.

EXT. ELROY'S BACK YARD - CONTINUOUS

Uncle Elroy and Craig start to walk around the back yard.  In
the B.G., we NOTICE giant weed plants everywhere.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Yeah, you gotta have a little money to
	live out here, Craig.  I never thought
	I'd be the kinda nigga to move to the
	suburbs.  But as soon as I got my check,
	I was gone.  Paid 230 thousand dollars
	cash on this house.

		CRAIG
	You paid cash?

		UNCLE ELROY
	Cash money.  They wasn't gonna stick me
	with no 30-year payment plan.  That's for
	suckas.  They got my daddy like that for
	a Cadillac years ago.  I got the only
	house on the block that's paid for.
	That's why I'm the king around here.

They walk over to the pool.

		UNCLE ELROY (cont'd)
	You like that pool?

It's half-full with dirty water.  An upside-down lawn chair
floats in it.

		CRAIG
	It's cool, but where's the water?

		UNCLE ELROY
	Don't need water.  We didn't have no pool
	in the projects...so none of us swim.

		CRAIG
	Y'all never use it?

		UNCLE ELROY
	Never...
		(humping the air)
	But me and Suga can get real nasty in
	that Jacuzzi, though.

The Jacuzzi water has a purple condom floating in it.  Uncle
Elroy reaches over and picks it out.

		UNCLE ELROY (cont'd)
		(shaking the water off the
		 condom)
	You welcome get in it anytime you want
	to.  Shit, you my brother's son.

		CRAIG
	That's okay, Unc.  I can't swim, either.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Good.

EXT. CRACK HOUSE - MORNING

A run-down crack house sits alone in the middle of the block.
It looks deserted with chipped paint, overgrown grass and
security bars everywhere.  Inside we can hear a FIGHT in
progress.

		CRACK DEALER (O.S.)
	Ezal, I'm sick of you coming around here
	wit no money.

Suddenly the door flies open and Ezal comes flying out on his
ass.

		EZAL
	I be damned.

He gets up and brushes himself off.  He heads back into the
crack house.

		EZAL (cont'd)
	Now look here, man.  I'mma preferred
	customer and I can take my credit card
	somewhere else.

SMACK!  SMACK!  SMACK!  Ezal is roughed up some more and
flies through the picture window.  GLASS rains down.

		EZAL (cont'd)
	Oh, my neck, oh, my back.  Man, I quit!
	I'm retired!  Officially!  Life shouldn't
	be this hard for a crackhead!

Ezal lays there in pain.  Out of nowhere, a bicycle comes
INTO FRAME.  Ezal looks up at the rider.  It's Debo.

		DEBO
	Where did Craig move to?

		EZAL
	I don't know, Debo.

Debo rolls on top of him with the front tire.  Ezal is
smashed and in more pain.

		DEBO
	What you say?

		EZAL
		(hurting)
	He moved out to Rancho Cucamonga with his
	cousin Day-Day.

		DEBO
	Rancho Cucamonga?

		EZAL
	Yeah.

Debo thinks about it.

		EZAL (cont'd)
	I can't breathe.

He rolls off of Ezal.  Relief.

		DEBO
	Get on.

		EZAL
	Man, we can't ride to Rancho Cucamonga on
	that.

		DEBO
	Get on!

Ezal hops on the handlebars quick.  They start to ride off.

		EZAL
	Just don't go over the curb.

Debo rides over the curb and into the street.  The journey
begins.

		EZAL (cont'd)
	Watch my balls!

INT. DAY-DAY'S ROOM - MORNING

Day-Day's room is junky.  Clothes are everywhere.  He's
putting on his Pinky's Records and Disc T-shirt.  Craig comes
in.

		CRAIG
	You straight?

		DAY-DAY
	Yeah, I'm alright.  Is my face still
	orange to you?

Day-Day's face looks sunburned.

		CRAIG
	Just a little.

		DAY-DAY
	I can't taste nothing.

		CRAIG
	What's the matter with your girlfriend?

		DAY-DAY
	Man, it's a long story.  I met D'Wana
	three months ago.  She had a little pudge
	in her stomach but I didn't pay it no
	attention.  Come to find out, she six
	months pregnant.  Saying I'm the daddy!

		CRAIG
	What?

		DAY-DAY
	Yeah, I broke up with her two Fridays ago
	and she's been harassing me ever since.
	She don't care about the restraining
	order or nothing.

		CRAIG
	Restraining order?  Where the hell you
	meet this girl?

		DAY-DAY
	I went back to Watts to sell my old car
	and met her on the way.  Worst day of my
	life.

		CRAIG
	Damn, you got a stalker.

		DAY-DAY
	That ain't the worst part.  Her little
	sister, Baby D.  She's the one that gets
	real physical.  But I got a restraining
	order on her, too.

		CRAIG
	You got a restraining order on a little
	girl named Baby D?

		DAY-DAY
		(very serious)
	You don't know Baby D.

He looks at his watch.

		DAY-DAY (cont'd)
	I gotta get to Pinky's before I get fired
	like you.

Day-Day exits.  Craig is close behind.

EXT. UNCLE ELROY'S HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

As they walk out the front door, someone catches Craig's eye.
It's KARLA (23), the Joker brothers' fine sister.  She's
leaning against the lowrider, looking into her purse.  She
waves at them.

		KARLA
		(friendly)
	Hi!

Craig and Day-Day are mesmerized.

		BOTH
		(waving back)
	HEY!

Craig and Karla's eyes meet.  She smiles.

		CRAIG
	Who is that?

		DAY-DAY
	That's the sister.

		CRAIG
	Yo know what?  I'm starting to like
	Rancho Cucamonga.

		DAY-DAY
	I know what 'cha thinking.  I thought the
	same thing.  But it can't happen.

		CRAIG
	Why?

		DAY-DAY
	Because, it's been a little tension
	between us ever since they got out the
	joint and ran their momma crazy.  And I'm
	just trying to keep the peace.  We moved
	out here to get away from that shit.

Day-Day walks over to his Beamer.  Craig follows.

CLOSE-UP

Big scratch on the side of Day-Day's car.

WIDER

		DAY-DAY (cont'd)
	It ain't that bad, is it?

Craig is still looking at Karla.

		DAY-DAY (cont'd)
	Craig!  It ain't that bad, is it?

		CRAIG
	Yeah, it's bad.  And that scratch make it
	ugly.

Day-Day is starting to get mad.

		CRAIG (cont'd)
	It's long and crooked...make you not
	wanna even drive it.

		DAY-DAY
	Alright, alright... I see what you
	talking about.

Karla looks at her watch and starts to walk up the street.
This is Craig's chance.

		CRAIG
	Hold up, Day-Day.

He trots after her.

		DAY-DAY
	Let it go.

Karla is still walking.

		CRAIG
	Hey!  Hey!

She stops and waits for him.

		CRAIG (cont'd)
	I'm Day-Day's cousin, Craig.  What's your
	name?

		KARLA
	Karla.

		CRAIG
	Craig and Karla, damn that sound pretty
	good together.  Where you going?

		KARLA
	To the Cucamonga shopping center.

		CRAIG
	Oh yeah, why you walking?

		KARLA
	My brothers won't give me a ride.

Day-Day is about to have a heart attack.  He's looking back
and forth between Craig and Karla, and the Joker's house
where somebody is looking out the window.

		DAY-DAY
		(to himself)
	Just get the number and come on.  Just
	get the number and come on.

Back at the "Love Connection," Craig has Karla smiling.

		CRAIG
	You want us to give you a ride?

		KARLA
	I don't know.

		CRAIG
	What you mean, you don't know?  Just wait
	here.

Craig starts to trot over towards Day-Day.  Day-Day is
frantically waving Craig to hurry.

		CRAIG (cont'd)
	What are you worried about?

Day-Day's eyes get as big as golf balls.

		DAY-DAY
	Cheeco!

Craig turns to see the pit bull "Cheeco" running right after
him.

		KARLA
	Cheeco, no!

Craig runs right towards Day-Day's BMW.

		DAY-DAY
	Oh shit, jump!

They both jump on top of Day-Day's BMW with CHEECO coming up
fast.  He's BARKING viciously.

ACROSS STREET

Joker, Li'l Joker and Baby Joker are across the street
laughing.  Karla is embarrassed.

ON BMW

Craig is breathing hard but he's calm, but Day-Day is
terrified.

		DAY-DAY (cont'd)
	Hey, Joker!  Stop playing, man!  Call the
	dog back!

They continue to laugh.  Craig pulls his belt off.  He swings
it and hits Cheeco in the middle of his forehead with the
buckle.  The DOG CRIES and runs back across the street.

The Jokers aren't laughing anymore.  Joker stares at Craig.
Craig stares back.  You can feel the tension.  Joker kicks
the dog.

		JOKER
	Get yo dumb ass in the back.

CHEECO HOLLERS.  Craig and Day-Day get off the top of the
BMW.

		DAY-DAY
	Look at my roof.

Big dents in the roof of his BMW.

		DAY-DAY (cont'd)
	Man, why you do that?  I told you not to
	talk to that girl.

		CRAIG
	Why not?  She was cool with it.

Day-Day gets into the car.

		DAY-DAY
	So.

		CRAIG
	What you mean, so?

		DAY-DAY
	If you 'get into it' with them S.A.'s and
	start a feud, you can always go back to
	home.  I gotta live here.  Just remember
	that.

He slams the door, starts the car and backs up.  Leaving
Craig standing there.  He sees Karla walking away.  He looks
over at the Jokers.  They're still staring hard.  Craig just
looks away and walks into the house.

INT. UNCLE ELROY'S HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

Craig steps into the house.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Nephew, you got perfect timing...

Uncle Elroy is sitting on the couch.  He has a Phillies'
Blunt (cigar) in one hand, a razor blade in the other.

		UNCLE ELROY (cont'd)
	We about to start a little puff, puff
	give in this mothafucka.  Are you down?

Suga is sippin' on a glass of wine.  She moves over, making
room in the middle.

		SUGA
		(patting the couch)
	Come on, Craig.  Sit down right here.

Craig does.  Suga moves closer, boxing him in nice and tight.
Uncle Elroy licks the cigar.

		UNCLE ELROY
	I know you smoke weed, right?

		CRAIG
	Why you say that?

		UNCLE ELROY
	'Cause your lips is getting black.

Uncle Elroy takes the razor and starts to cut the cigar the
long way.

		UNCLE ELROY (cont'd)
	All I smoke is blunts.  Them fuckin'
	Zigzags don't do nothing for me.

Uncle Elroy scrapes the cigar shavings into a nearby trash
can (that's overflowing with cigar shavings already).  Suga
presses against Craig.

		SUGA
	Would you like a glass of wine, baby?

		CRAIG
	No thank you. It's too early.

Uncle Elroy stuffs the open cigar full of weed.  He's
concentrating.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Boy, I can roll a blunt better than them
	bitches in Havana.  I know Willie don't
	let'cha smoke in the house, but I'm ya
	uncle.  I don't care how high you get in
	my house.  Long as you let me hit it...

He licks and rolls.

		UNCLE ELROY (cont'd)
	Look at that.

It's perfect.

		SUGA
	Fire it up, Roy.

Uncle Elroy grabs the lighter.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Now I'mma show you the real "Puff Daddy."

He lights the blunt.  Craig's watching, so is Suga.  Uncle
Elroy holds the smoke in for a very long time.  Maybe too
long...'cause his eyes start to bulge, and he starts to toke
(cough with your mouth closed).  And toke.  And toke.  And
toke.  It looks like he's about to bust when he lets out a
big puff of smoke.  Then he starts to cough, and cough, and
cough out of control.

Craig and Suga are amazed at this display.  Uncle Elroy falls
to the floor on his hands and knees.  Still coughing.  He
falls on his back and passes the blunt to Craig.

		UNCLE ELROY (cont'd)
		(still coughing)
	It's the Bombay.

Craig takes the blunt and puts it up to his lips.  He hits
it, holds it in and looks at Suga.  Suddenly, his eyes bulge
out and he starts to toke, and toke, and toke, and toke.  He
starts to cough out of control and he falls next to Uncle
Elroy who's still coughing.  Craig passes the blunt to Suga,
who looks at it for a moment and then looks directly INTO the
CAMERA.  (As if to say, "Shiiiiiiiiiiiit.").

INT. UNCLE ELROY'S HOUSE - 15 MINUTES LATER

All three are passed out on the couch.  Uncle Elroy is
snoring with a little slobber hanging.  Craig's knocked out
with his mouth open.  Suga's head is not secure and she's
starting to bob.  She bobs so hard that her head falls in
Craig's lap.  He wakes up and looks down.

		CRAIG
	Suga.

He looks over at Uncle Elroy who's looking over at him.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Negro, what the hell you doing to my
	woman?

		CRAIG
		(confused and dazed)
	I don't know!

		UNCLE ELROY
	Suga!

		SUGA
		(face in lap)
	Huh?

		UNCLE ELROY
	What you doing to my nephew?

		SUGA
		(lifting her head)
	Ah, baby...I thought this was you.
		(to Craig)
	Craig, what are you doing to me?

		CRAIG
	I don't know, I think I passed out or
	something.  I don't remember.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Passed out?  Can't hang, huh?  Boy, I
	knew you was a lightweight.  Passed out
	on one funky ass blunt.  They don't make
	'em like they used to, baby.

Uncle Elroy staggers to his feet.

		UNCLE ELROY (cont'd)
	Come on, woman.  I'm faded and feeling X-
	rated.  It's Mr. Nasty time.

		SUGA
	Mr. Nasty time?

		UNCLE ELROY
	Mr. Nasty time.
		(grabbing his back)
	But take it easy on me, girl.

		SUGA
	Craig, you ain't the only lightweight
	around here.

Suga takes Elroy's hand.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Make yourself at home.

They both stumble upstairs leaving Craig all alone.  It's too
quiet now.  He grabs the remote and TURNS ON the TV.  Flicks
a few channels.  He picks up the blunt and the lighter.

ON TV

A public service announcement from King/Drew Rehab Center.
It's SMOKEY!

		SMOKEY (V.O.)
	Hi, my name is Smokey.  And I'm a bud-
	head.  But here at the King/Drew Rehab
	Center, they help you curve your crave
	for marijuana but still let you get your
	drank on.

He lifts a 22 oz. bottle of Olde English.

		SMOKEY (cont'd) (V.O.)
	It's too hard to stop everything all at
	once.  So some days they let you smoke,
	but not drank.  And other days you can
	drank, but not smoke.  And if you're
	really making progress, the nurses will
	get fucked up wit you.  Helping you kick
	the habit by smoking up all yo shit.  So
	come down to the King/Drew Rehab Center
	and put down the joint, but B.Y.O.B.,
	man!

BACK ON COUCH

Craig is high.  He's looking at the TV with a slight smile on
his face.  It seems like the walls are shaking.  He looks
over at Suga's glass and her wine is vibrating, like Jurassic
Park.  Plaster falls from the ceiling.  He listens, it's
Uncle Elroy and Suga making love.

		UNCLE ELROY (O.S.)
	Oh, baby, right there.  Right
	there...bite the nipple, baby.  Bite it!
	Bite it!  Yeah, mothafucka -- yeah, come
	on, baby, get busy...

His eavesdropping is interrupted by a loud KNOCK on the door.
Craig is so comfortable, he doesn't want to move.  The
KNOCKING gets LOUDER.

		DELIVERY GUY (O.S.)
	Delivery!

		CRAIG
	Hold on.

Craig gets up slowly and starts to clean the area.  The
KNOCKING CONTINUES.

		DELIVERY GUY (O.S.)
	Delivery!

		CRAIG
	I said hold on!

		DELIVERY GUY (O.S.)
	Could you hurry up, please... it's kinda
	hot out here.

Craig stops what he's doing and swings the door open.

ON PORCH

The DELIVERY GUY, a thirtysomething asshole with tight shorts
and a buzz cut, is looking into the house.

		CRAIG
	Can I help you?

		DELIVERY GUY
	Nice house. Didn't expect you to answer.
	You must be one of those entertainers.
	What team you play for?

		CRAIG
	I don't play for no team.

		DELIVERY GUY
	Come on, jerky, you can tell me.  Got a
	white wife, huh?  Blonde bombshell type.
	Remember what happen to O.J... what team
	do you play for?  You're not related to
	the Jacksons, are you?

		CRAIG
		(in his face)
	Naw, I play for the Chocamunga Cracker
	Killers.  You want tickets?

		DELIVERY GUY
	Okay, buddy.  Don't send your entourage
	out here to do a 187 on me.  It's just a
	certified mail delivery.

He hands Craig a letter.

		DELIVERY GUY (cont'd)
	Sign here.

Craig signs.

		CRAIG
	What is it?

		DELIVERY GUY
	Delinquent Property Tax Notice... I hope
	the Cracker Killers pay well 'cause if
	not, back to the ghetto you go.  Wife
	stays here, of course.

He laughs and walks off singing the "Good Times" jingle.

		DELIVERY GUY (cont'd)
	'...temporary layoffs?  Good
	Times...hustling and surviving... Good
	Times...ain't we lucky we got'em...' Oh
	shit!

Cheeco starts to chase him down the street.  Craig looks at
the notice.  "DELINQUENT! YOUR HOUSE WILL BE SEIZED AND
AUCTIONED -- TOMORROW AT 9AM  PAY TODAY!"

		CRAIG
	Oh damn.

He SLAMS the DOOR.  We FOLLOW Craig upstairs TO Uncle Elroy's
room.  He knocks softly.

		CRAIG (cont'd)
	Uncle Elroy?

No answer.

		CRAIG (cont'd)
	Uncle Elroy, you got a tax notice.

Still no answer.  He turns the knob.  It's open.

INT. UNCLE ELROY'S BEDROOM - CONTINUOUS

Craig steps into Uncle Elroy's freak palace.  Black lights,
candles, velvet posters - the works.  There's even a leather
fuck swing hanging from the ceiling.  Uncle Elroy and Suga
are asleep in a leopard-skin waterbed.  Craig is amazed.  He
slowly walks over to the bed.  Uncle Elroy is calling the
hogs.  Snoring.

		CRAIG
		(whispering)
	Uncle Elroy...Uncle Elroy?

He's about to shake him when Uncle Elroy lets out a big
grunt.  It startles Craig.  He looks over at Suga.  She's
completely under the covers.  Uncle Elroy rolls over on his
stomach, then he rolls on his back again.  Craig shakes him.

		CRAIG (cont'd)
	Uncle Elroy, wake up.  You got a letter
	today.

No response.  Craig tries again.

		CRAIG (cont'd)
	Unc.

Uncle Elroy jumps up like a hibernating grizzly.

		UNCLE ELROY
		(half asleep)
	Come on here, Suga...

He goes after Craig, who has to fight him off.

		UNCLE ELROY (cont'd)
	I like it rough now.

		CRAIG
	Naw, naw!  Unc, wake up!  It's me!  Wake
	up!

Uncle Elroy grabs him in a bear hug and slams him on the bed.

Craig finds himself caught between Suga and Uncle Elroy, but
now everything is totally still and quiet.  Uncle Elroy
starts to snore again.  He's asleep.  The coast is clear now.
Craig tries to make his escape.  He crawls over Suga to get
away.  She grabs him and starts to kiss him.

		SUGA
		(half asleep)
	Ohhh, baby!

Craig breaks away and tries to hurry out the room.  On his
exit, he hangs himself on the "fuck swing" and hits the floor
with a thud.  He scrambles to his feet, then he's out of
there.  Uncle Elroy and Suga lay asleep as if nothing ever
happened.

IN HALLWAY

Craig tries to gain his composure.  He gets an idea.

EXT. BUSY CITY STREET - AFTERNOON

Debo is riding Ezal on the handlebars.

		EZAL
	We gotta stop or something, man.  My ass
	is hurting.  This handlebar is hard.

Debo keeps riding.

		EZAL (cont'd)
	Debo!  Debo!  Now you stuck on stupid.

He finally stops at a pay phone.  Ezal jumps off and grabs
his ass.

		EZAL (cont'd)
	My God...gotta walk it out, walk it out.
	Man, it's gonna take us a week to ride
	out there.

		DEBO
	Shut up!  He still eats here every day!

EXT. SANDWICH JOINT - ACROSS STREET - CONTINUOUS

Mr. Jones' dog truck sits in front.

		DEBO
	Here's the plan.  You gonna call over
	there and say you have a very urgent
	message for Mr. William Jones.

		EZAL
	What urgent message?

		DEBO
	If you shut up I'll tell you.  The urgent
	message is...Drop everything!  Craig is
	in trouble.  Come quick, don't call.

		EZAL
	That ain't gonna work.

Debo slaps him in the back of the head.

		DEBO
	Just do it.

		EZAL
	I don't know the number.

Smack!  Debo slaps him again.

		DEBO
	It's on the outside of the building, now
	pick the phone up!

Ezal picks up the phone.  He starts to dial.

		EZAL
	Hello...Yeah, I got an urgent message for
	a nigga named Mr. Willie Jones.

Debo slaps him again.

		DEBO
	William.

		EZAL
	Yeah, I got a urgent message for a
	customer named William Jones.  Drop
	everything, Craig is in trouble.  Come
	quick.  Don't try to call.

Ezal hangs up the phone.

		EZAL (cont'd)
	Man, you better stop hittin' on me for I
	do you like Craig did you.

		DEBO
	Let's go.

Debo and Ezal run across the street to the dog truck.  Debo
opens the back and lets all the dogs out.  They run for it.

		DEBO (cont'd)
	After I get in, close the door.

Debo is a hard fit.  Ezal stuffs him in there.

		EZAL
	You too big.

		DEBO
	Keep pushing.

Finally he's in.  Ezal gets in and slams the door shut.  Just
then, Mr. Jones comes running out the joint with a sandwich
in hand.

		MR. JONES
	Oh my God!

He gets in and speeds off.

EXT. CUCAMONGA SHOPPING CENTER - AFTERNOON

Cars pull in and out of this 12 store strip mall where
Pinky's is located.

INT. PINKY'S RECORDS AND DISC - AFTERNOON

Everything is pink inside this mom and pop record store.  The
latest RAP HIT PLAYS in the B.G.  A few people exit the store
with bags.

Day-Day is scanning inventory.  A bud-head by the name of
ROACH is on top of the counter with his skateboard.

		ROACH
	Yo, Day-Day!  Check me out.

He tries to jump off the counter and land perfectly on his
board.  Wrong!  Off the board and on his ass.

		DAY-DAY
	Look, Roach, I know you ain't never
	worked in a record shop before and you're
	a little excited.  But if Pinky catches
	you doing that X-Games shit off his
	counter top, we both getting fired.  You
	feel me?

		ROACH
	I feel you.  I've just been practicing
	that one move all week.
		(disappointed)
	I thought that was it.

An unhappy CUSTOMER walks in holding a CD without the cover.

		CUSTOMER #1
	I can't get jiggy with this shit.
		(getting loud)
	Where is the damn manager?

		DAY-DAY
	Sir, the manager stepped out for a
	moment.  I'm currently running the store.
	Can I see the CD?

The customer throws the CD on the counter.  Day-Day picks it
up.

		CUSTOMER #1
	No, give me my damn money back.  Right
	now, and I don't have no damn receipt
	neither.

		DAY-DAY
	Okay, sir...but where's the cover?

		CUSTOMER #1
	I don't have no damn cover.

Craig walks in with the notice in hand.

		DAY-DAY
	I can't give you your damn money back on
	this.

		CUSTOMER #1
	Bullshit!  I'll go postal in this
	mothafucka!

		DAY-DAY
	Well, you gonna have to go postal then.

The customer KNOCKS over a counter display and then turns to
get away.

		DAY-DAY (cont'd)
	Hey!

Craig bumps him and he falls into the Rap cassette rack.

		CUSTOMER #1
	I'm sorry!  Don't hit me!  Don't hit me.

He jumps up and slips on a few more cassettes on his scramble
out the door.

		DAY-DAY
	...and if you come back, it's gonna be
	worse.

Roach can't believe what just happened.

		ROACH
	Did you see that?  That was a W.W.F. hit
	right there, huh, Day-Day?

		DAY-DAY
	Yeah, it was.  How you get up here?

		CRAIG
	I walked.

		DAY-DAY
	You walked?

		CRAIG
	Yeah, ya'll got a notice today.  It came
	certified mail.

He gives it to Day-Day.

		DAY-DAY
	Craig, this Roach.  Roach, this is my
	cousin, Craig.

		ROACH
	What up, bro?

Craig nods his head.

		CRAIG
	I tried to wake up Uncle Elroy but he
	thought I was Suga.

Day-Day reads the notice.

		DAY-DAY
	You know what this is?

		CRAIG
	Yeah, that's why I walked down here.

		ROACH
	What it say?

Day-Day ignores Roach.

		DAY-DAY
	How can they do this?

		CRAIG
	I don't know.  Did ya'll forget to pay it
	or something?

		ROACH
	What it say?

		DAY-DAY
	Ever since my momma died the bills are
	always late.

		CRAIG
	See how much it is?

Day-Day opens it.  A PHONE starts to RING.

		ROACH
	What is it?

		DAY-DAY
	Don't worry about it, man.  Get the
	phone.

Roach skateboards over to the phone.

		ROACH
	Pinky's.

Day-Day reads on.

		DAY-DAY
	It says we owe $3,900...by tomorrow.

		CRAIG
	Damn...how much money ya'll got left from
	the lottery?

Day-Day goes for his bank book.  He flips a few pages.

		DAY-DAY
	$247.

		CRAIG
	Okay, plan B.

Day-Day is overwhelmed.  Roach skates back over.

		ROACH
	That was a girl on a cell phone.  She
	said she's outside in the parking lot
	waiting for you to take her to lunch.

Day-Day looks at Craig.  He runs over to the door.

OUTSIDE IN THE PARKING LOT

D'Wana sits in her car with her play sister BABY'D (her name
does not fit her body).

		DAY-DAY
	Oh my God.  That's D'Wana.  And she got
	Baby'D with her.

Day-Day locks the door and runs into the back.  Craig and
Roach follow.

		CRAIG
	What's the matter?

		DAY-DAY
	D'Wana brought Baby'D up here.

		ROACH
	That the big one, huh?

		DAY-DAY
	You damn right that's the big one.

The PHONE starts to RING again.  D'Wana and Baby'D are at the
door.  D'Wana is on her phone.  Baby'D starts to knock.

		DAY-DAY (cont'd)
	Craig, go out there and tell 'em I'm
	gone.

		CRAIG
	I ain't trying to get in it.

		DAY-DAY
	You already in.

The knocking gets louder.

		CRAIG
	No I'm not.

		ROACH
	I'll do it.

		DAY-DAY
	No.  You can't handle a girl like D'Wana.
	It's got to be Craig.

AT FRONT DOOR

They observe the "Yes We're Open" sign.

		D'WANA
	That white boy said he was in there.

		BABY'D
	Day-Day, don't make me break this window!

Craig is peeking out.  He hesitates.

		DAY-DAY
	Watch out for Baby'D.

Craig walks out the back.  He steps over the door.  Unlocks
it, and cracks it open.

		CRAIG
	Day-Day ain't here.

They don't believe him.

		D'WANA
	Who are you?

		CRAIG
	I'm his cousin.

		BABY'D
	You suppose to work here now or
	something?

		CRAIG
	Yeah, I work here now.

		D'WANA
	We didn't come here for Day-Day.

		CRAIG
	Yes you did.

		D'WANA
	No we didn't.  We came to buy a CD.

		BABY'D
	Now move.

Baby'D kicks the door.  Craig has no choice but to let 'em
in.

		D'WANA
	Where's that boy that told me Day-Day was
	here?

		CRAIG
	I don't know... I think he went out the
	back.

		D'WANA
	Can I look for myself?

Suddenly Roach is pushed into the front area.

		ROACH
	Hey, ladies.

		D'WANA
	Where's Day-Day?

		ROACH
	I don't know, he must've left.

D'Wana looks at Baby'D.

		CRAIG
	I thought ya'll wanted to buy a CD?

		BABY'D
	I do... can you help me find the jazz
	section?

Craig looks at Roach for directions.  He nods over towards
the front of the store.

		CRAIG
	Right this way.  You know damn well you
	don't listen to no jazz.

Baby'D checks out Craig as he leads the way.  D'Wana looks
around.

		D'WANA
	If Day-Day comes back, tell him I came by
	and need to see him.  Lamaze classes are
	Wednesday.

		ROACH
	Will do.

D'Wana starts to walk towards Craig and Baby'D.

		D'WANA
	Come on, 'D, let's go.

But first she doubles back towards the storage room.

		CRAIG
	Where you going?

		D'WANA
	Ain't the rest room this way?  I gotta
	pee.

		ROACH
	Yeah.

		D'WANA
	Thank you.

As she's walking in the back, Roach realizes his mistake.

BACK STORAGE AREA

		DAY-DAY
	Shit.

Day-Day makes a run for it.  She spots him ducking out the
back door.

		D'WANA
	He's in there!

INSIDE STORE

Baby'D knocks Craig out of the way.

		BABY'D
	Where is he?

		D'WANA
	He ran out the door.

Baby'D gives chase with D'Wana, Craig and Roach close behind.

EXT. PINKY'S RECORDS AND DISC - CONTINUOUS

Day-Day runs around the side of Pinky's Records store.  He
stops to see if anyone is coming.  It's Baby'D with the three
others trailing.  Baby'D is chasing Day-Day all through the
parking lot.  Craig, D'Wana and Roach stop to watch.

		ROACH
	Haul ass, dude.  Don't stop.

...and he is.

		CRAIG
	You better stop running from that girl.

		DAY-DAY
	Fuuuuuuck -- U!

He runs back towards his BMW.  The chase continues around his
car.  Baby'D is starting to tire.

		DAY-DAY (cont'd)
	I'mma shoot yo' big ass.

D'Wana watches from a distance.  Craig and Roach are close.

		ROACH
		(smiling)
	She moves well for a big girl.

Just then, out of nowhere, Karla appears behind them carrying
a couple of bags.  She taps Craig on his shoulder.  He turns
around.

		KARLA
	Hello, remember me?

		CRAIG
	Hell yeah, I remember you.

		KARLA
	I'm sorry for what my brother did this
	morning.  They're assholes.

		CRAIG
	It's cool.  You ain't got to apologize
	for your brothers.  They're big boys.

		KARLA
	I just wanted to give you this.

She hands him a card with her number on it.

		KARLA (cont'd)
	If my brothers wasn't so over-protective,
	I'd have you call the house.  But for now
	just page me when you get a chance.

		CRAIG
	Most definitely.

		KARLA
	Better sooner than later.

She picks up her shopping bags and walks away.  Over at the
chase: Baby'D is winded.  She bends over trying to catch her
breath.

		DAY-DAY
	Baby'D, you're not going to catch me as
	usual.  So what can we do to end it this
	time?  What you want?  Another Big Pun
	CD?  'Cause I gotta get back to work.

Baby'D looks over at Craig.

		BABY'D
	Okay, I know what I want this time.

		DAY-DAY
	Anything you need.

		BABY'D
	Yo' cousin, Craig.  Hook us up.

		DAY-DAY
	That's it?

		BABY'D
	Just tell him to come over here and talk
	to me.

		DAY-DAY
	And I can go free?

		BABY'D
	Go, fo' I change my mind.

Day-Day carefully walks back over towards the store.  D'Wana
pouts and walks towards Baby'D.  (If looks could kill.)

		ROACH
	Great moves, Day-Day.

		CRAIG
	What happen?

		DAY-DAY
	We worked out a deal.  All you gotta do
	is go over there and talk to Baby'D.

Craig looks over at Baby'D.  She's waiting.

		CRAIG
	What you mean talk to her?

		ROACH
		(still smiling)
	You know what he mean, dude.

		CRAIG
	I'm gone.

Craig turns and sprints into the store.  Baby'D looks
concerned.  Day-Day grabs Roach and they run into the store.

		BABY'D
	I'mma get you, Day-Day!  You gotta come
	out sometimes!

D'Wana hands her a brick.

		D'WANA
	I told you.

Baby'D screams and throws the brick through Day-Day's
WINDSHIELD.

INT. PINKY'S RECORDS AND DISC - CONTINUOUS

		DAY-DAY
	What was that?

		ROACH
		(looking out window)
	You don't wanna know.

Day-Day is devastated.

		DAY-DAY
	Thanks a lot, Craig.

		CRAIG
	I know we cousins and all, but don't try
	an' hook me up with the big little
	sisters.

		DAY-DAY
	Big bitches need love, too, Craig.

		ROACH
	For sure.  That's how I like 'em.

		CRAIG
	Not me.

		DAY-DAY
	Are they still out there?

		ROACH
	Negative...they vamped.

Day-Day starts to walk into the back storage area.

		ROACH (cont'd)
	Shouldn't we straighten up out here
	before Pinky gets back?

Day-Day is like a zombie now.  He doesn't answer, just keeps
walking.

		CRAIG
	Day-Day?

No answer.  Craig looks at Roach.  They follow.

BACK STORAGE AREA

Day-Day sits with the notice in hand.

		DAY-DAY
	Today ain't my day.

		ROACH
	Bummer, huh?  And Friday is suppose to be
	a kick-ass day.

		CRAIG
	Yeah it is...the best day before the
	weekend.

		ROACH
	That's fuckin' poetic, Craig.

Day-Day is still sad.

		ROACH (cont'd)
	I know how you feeling.  And if I had my
	bong right now, I'd let you 'toke 'til
	you choke.'  Dude, right here.  All out.
	No lungs.  All I got is this.

Roach pulls out a big, smashed brownie with green shit in it.

		CRAIG
	What's the green stuff poking out?

		ROACH
	That's cron-don, sir.  My mom hates for
	me to smoke, so she made me bud-brownies.
	Wanna bite?

		CRAIG
	Naw, I already ate.

		ROACH
	Come on, Day, try it.  For moms.

Day-Day shakes his head.  Craig reaches into his fifth
pocket.

		CRAIG
	It ain't a bong but, wa-la!

He has the joint from this morning.

		ROACH
	Wo!

Roach snatches it.

		CRAIG
	Hey.

Craig snatches it back.

		ROACH
	Sorry, bro, reflexes.  How did you do
	that?

		CRAIG
	Black magic.

Day-Day snatches the joint and puts it in his mouth.

		DAY-DAY
	Give me dat.  I'm the one with the
	problem.

Roach pulls out a mini-skateboard that's actually a lighter.

		ROACH
	Weed doesn't solve problems.  It eases
	the mind, and the soul.  Enjoy.

He lights the joint.  Day-Day takes a hit.

		CRAIG
	I didn't think you smoked bud that much.

		DAY-DAY
		(letting out the smoke)
	I don't.

		ROACH
		(taking the joint)
	I do.

		DAY-DAY
	Damn nigga, don't Jack the joint.  I
	didn't even pass it.

		ROACH
		(hitting it good)
	Sorry, dude.

		CRAIG
	You better open up a window or something
	before the smell gets out.

		DAY-DAY
	Ain't no windows in here.

		ROACH
	I got an idea.

He hands the joint to Craig.  Gets up and closes the door.
Then he grabs the vacuum out of the corner.

		ROACH (cont'd)
	This is a little theory of mine... it
	should work.

He plugs in the VACUUM and TURNS it ON.  He puts the nozzle
in Day-Day's face.

		DAY-DAY
	Blow.

		CRAIG
	That ain't gonna work.

		ROACH
	Fuck yeah.

Day-Day hits the 'J and blows into the nozzle.  It quickly
sucks up the smoke.

		DAY-DAY
		(passing the 'J)
	It works.

		CRAIG
	Still gonna smell it.

		ROACH
	No way.  Watch this.

Roach hits the joint harder than anyone else.  Smoke starts
to come out of his ears.  Craig and Day-Day get a kick out of
that.

EXT. PINKY'S RECORDS AND DISC - CONTINUOUS

A pink limo pulls to a stop.  The chauffeur gets out wearing
his suit just a little too tight.  He opens the door and a
pair of pink boots hit the pavement.  The CAMERA PANS UP TO
PINKY (35), the asshole owner.

		PINKY
	Look, man, you hittin' them goddamn
	corners too fast.  Slow down.  I almost
	spilled my Hennessy on this 300 dollar
	suit.

He walks over to the door.  He thinks it's open.  It's not.

		PINKY (cont'd)
	I be damn.

He shakes the door.  It's locked.  He looks inside.  No one's
at the counter.  Cassettes all over the floor.  Pinky looks
around making sure no one sneaks up on him.  He reaches under
his shirt and pulls out a Glock 9mm.  Sticks his key in the
door and steps in.

BACK STORE AREA - CLOSE UP - ROACH

is upside down.  All the blood has rushed to his head.  He
has Chinaman eyes and a big smile on his face.

		DAY-DAY
	Roach, what are you doing?

		ROACH
	R-U-S-H Intensely.

A big cloud of smoke rolls out of his mouth and he falls and
hits the deck.

		ROACH (cont'd)
	My spleen.

Craig and Day-Day laugh at Roach.  The VACUUM is still GOING
but the room is very smoky.  Craig jumps in.

		CRAIG
		(unplugging the vacuum)
	This vacuum don't work.  Where's the
	restroom?

		DAY-DAY
	Out the door and to the left.

		ROACH
	I thought the vacuum would work.

IN HALLWAY

Craig makes a left and grabs the knob.  He feels something
pressing on the back of his head (gun).

		PINKY
		(whispering)
	Don't move or I'll blow your head smooth
	off.

Craig throws his hands up.

		PINKY (cont'd)
	Now back up slowly... and don't say a
	word.

He obeys.  Pinky backs Craig into the store.

		PINKY (cont'd)
	Get on the floor.

Craig gets down.

		PINKY (cont'd)
	Little mothafucka trying to rob me.
	I'mma show you how I do 'em.

		CRAIG
	I ain't trying to rob you...

		PINKY
	Shut up!  Fo' I pump this Glock in yo'
	ass!  What did you do wit Day-Day and
	Roach?

		CRAIG
	Man, Day-Day is my people!

		PINKY
	I said shut up!  Now who sent you?

		CRAIG
	Nobody!

		PINKY
	If you say another word, it's over.  I'm
	not playing!

Pinky starts to pat down Craig's pockets.

		PINKY (cont'd)
	You ain't got no gun, but where's the
	weed at?  I smell it.

Craig says nothing.

		PINKY (cont'd)
	I'mma tie you ass up!

Pinky backs up and steps on Roach's skateboard.  The gun goes
flying and so does he.  Pinky falls on his ass.  The 9mm
lands in front of Craig.  There's a big scramble for the gun.

BACK STORAGE AREA

The mood is serious.

		DAY-DAY
	I gotta think of a plan to get this money
	before tomorrow.

		ROACH
	You could sell your Beamer.

Day-Day gives Roach the evil-eye.

		ROACH (cont'd)
	My bad.

		DAY-DAY
	I don't know.  I hope Craig got a good
	idea.  We gotta ask him when he comes
	out.  Let's go and clean up before Pinky
	gets here.

		ROACH
	Maybe you can ask him to loan you the
	money.

		DAY-DAY
	Yoooo, that's it.  You ain't as dumb as I
	think you are, Roach.

		ROACH
	I know.

BACK INSIDE STORE

Pinky and Craig are still scrambling for the gun.  The store
looks like a tornado hit it.  Twice.  Craig comes up with the
pistol.  Pinky jumps on the ground.

		PINKY
	Don't kill me.

Craig is exhausted.  He stands over Pinky with the gun.

		CRAIG
	Shut up.  I been trying to tell yo' ass
	that... Day-Day is my cousin.  They're
	right there in the back.

		PINKY
	Whatever you say, man.  I didn't see
	shit.  The safe combination is 34-5-27.
	Just take it all.

Just then, Day-Day and Roach come from the back.

		DAY-DAY
	Craig, what the hell are you doing?

		CRAIG
	Nothing.

		PINKY
	Day-Day, is this your cousin?

		DAY-DAY
	Yeah.

		PINKY
	Good.  You fired...and, Roach, your fired
	too.

		ROACH
	Why me?

		PINKY
	I smell weed.

He looks up at Craig.

		PINKY (cont'd)
	And you...you lucky.  I was just about to
	get in yo' ass.  Now give me my pistol
	back and get the hell out my store.

Craig looks at Day-Day.  Day-Day looks back at him.  Nobody's
high now.

EXT. FREEWAY - MONTAGE SEQUENCE - AFTERNOON

Mr. Jones' dog truck is weaving in and out of traffic.

INT. TRUCK - MONTAGE SEQUENCE - CONTINUOUS

Mr. Jones is driving and eating at the same time.  He
finishes off the last few bites of his sandwich.

		MR. JONES
	Just hold on, Craig.  I'm on my way.

INT. BACK OF TRUCK - MONTAGE SEQUENCE

Debo and Ezal are smashed inside the dog cages.

		EZAL
	Debo!  Debo!

		DEBO
	What?

		EZAL
	I can't feel my legs no more.

		DEBO
	Me neither.  How far is Rancho Cucamonga?

		EZAL
	I don't know.

EXT. UNCLE ELROY'S STREET - MONTAGE SEQUENCE

The Beamer pulls into the driveway.  Our trio get out with
very long faces.

		CRAIG (V.O.)
	In a strange way, I feel responsible for
	Day-Day getting fired.  If I wouldn't
	have fought Pinky, and gave Day-Day the
	joint, he'd still have a job.

Day-Day walks into the house while Craig and Roach stay out
on the porch.

INT. UNCLE ELROY'S HOUSE - UPSTAIRS - MONTAGE SEQUENCE

Uncle Elroy opens his bedroom door wearing a S&M mask and
holding a tube of KY jelly.  He removes the mask.  Day-Day
hands him the notice.  Uncle Elroy takes it with his greasy
hands.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Ah damn.  Damn.

		DAY-DAY
	I got fired too.

		UNCLE ELROY
	What?!

He starts to beat Day-Day with a sex toy.

EXT. FREEWAY - MONTAGE SEQUENCE - AFTERNOON

The dog truck exits the freeway.  He pulls into a gas station
by the freeway.  He stops near the restrooms and jumps out,
air freshner in hand.  When he gets to the door, it's locked.

		MR. JONES
	Damn.

He knocks.

		MR. JONES (cont'd)
	Say, man, hurry up.  We got an emergency
	out here.

No answer.  Mr. Jones paces nervously.

		MR. JONES (cont'd)
	I knew I shouldn't have ordered that
	extra hot sauce.

EXT. UNCLE ELROY'S PORCH - MONTAGE SEQUENCE - LATE AFTERNOON

Craig and Day-Day are trying to think.  Roach is practicing
skateboard moves.  He's not very good.

		DAY-DAY
	Man, sit down.

EXT. GAS STATION RESTROOM - MONTAGE SEQUENCE

He knocks again.

		MR. JONES
	Say, man, what the hell you doing in
	there?  Open the door.

Just then the door opens and out walks MICHAEL JORDAN.

		MICHAEL JORDAN
	Don't nobody go in the bathroom for about
	35, 40 minutes.

Mr. Jones is stunned.

		MR. JONES
	Hey, you that boy?

Jordan jumps in his car and he's gone.  Mr. Jones is happy
he's just seen Michael Jordan.

		MR. JONES (cont'd)
		(smiling)
	Ain't that something, Michael Jordan.

He walks in the bathroom.

INSIDE

Reality hits, it stinks up in there.  Mr. Jones fronds.

		MR. JONES (cont'd)
	Oh, Michael, that boy better check his
	drawls.

He starts to spray.

EXT. UNCLE ELROY'S PORCH - MONTAGE SEQUENCE - LATE AFTERNOON

Craig, Day-Day and Roach are sitting on the porch thinking.

		DAY-DAY
	What we gonna do?

		CRAIG
	I don't know yet.

		ROACH
	I know what I'mma do.  Go home and face
	the music.  My dad is gonna kick my ass
	for getting fired again.

He gets on his skateboard.

		DAY-DAY
	Alright, Roach, see you around.

		CRAIG
	Sorry about today, man.

		ROACH
	Yeah, me too.  Later.

He attempts to jump off the porch with his board and lands
dead on his ass once again.  His board continues to roll.

		DAY-DAY
	Man, sit down.  I can't think with you
	falling everywhere.

His board continues to roll into the street.  At this same
time, Joker's low-rider rolls by and breaks his board in two.
Roach runs to pick up the pieces.

		ROACH
	My board!

The Joker Bros. back their low-rider into the driveway.  They
have no sympathy.  Cheeco (the pitbull) is in the back yard.
He's happy to see them.

They stroll into the house with three Mexican girls with
them.  Joker spots our trio looking.

		JOKER
	What the fuck you looking at?

		DAY-DAY
	Nothing.

		ROACH
	You ran over my board!

		JOKER
	So what?  It shouldn't have been in the
	street.

They disappear into the house.

BACK ON PORCH

Craig has a twinkle in his eyes and Roach walks over, pissed.

		ROACH
	Who the fuck is that, Day-Day?

		DAY-DAY
	Let it go, Roach, trust me.

		ROACH
	I'm not letting nothing go.  They killed
	my board.

		DAY-DAY
	Let it go!

Craig is looking over at the Joker's house.  Baby Joker walks
out the front door.  He walks over to the rider and POPS the
TRUNK.

		CRAIG
	Wait.  Check'em out.

Baby Joker pulls out a chrome hydraulic pump.  He carries it
towards the house.  Cheeco starts to hump his leg.

		BABY JOKER
	Get down.

Baby Joker drops the pump, something falls out.  (We can't
see what it is.)  Baby Joker quickly puts it back.

BACK ON PORCH

		CRAIG
	You see that?

		DAY-DAY
	I didn't see nothing.

		ROACH
	Me neither.

		CRAIG
	It's something in that hydraulic pump.

		DAY-DAY
	Yeah, air.

		CRAIG
	Naw.  I bet'cha it's something better
	than air.

		DAY-DAY
	How you know?  It could be anything.

		CRAIG
	I don't know, and it could be anything.
	But I just say we go take a look.

		ROACH
	I say we go over there and kick their
	asses.  I can take the little one.

		DAY-DAY
	Are you out your mind?  I'm not messing
	with them S.A.'s boy.  You must be crazy.

		CRAIG
	Could be.  Rather be crazy than homeless.
	Now all we need is a big pack of baloney.

Day-Day and Roach look at each other.

		BOTH
	Baloney??

INT. JOKER'S HOUSE - DEN - NIGHT

The private party is starting to heat up.  Big Joker sits on
the couch with a PRETTY YOUNG GIRL on his lap.  He's smoking
on a perfectly rolled cone joint.  Li'l Joker dances with the
other girlfriend, as an OLD SCHOOL JAM PLAYS in the B.G.  The
other senorita is pouring herself a drink.

Karla walks into the room.

		KARLA
	I thought you were taking me to see Mama?

		JOKER
	I'll take you later.

		KARLA
	When?  After you get all drunk and
	loaded?

		JOKER
	Hey!  I said I'll take your fuckin' ass
	later.  Now get out of here.  You're
	scaring our company.

Karla storms out the room.  Baby Joker walks in carrying the
chrome pump.

		JOKER (cont'd)
	Get up.

The Pretty Girl moves off Joker's lap.

		JOKER (cont'd)
	Take it in the room.

Baby Joker carries the pump in the bedroom.  Joker is close
behind.  He SLAMS the DOOR.  The Girl dancing with Li'l Joker
gets too nosy.

		GIRL #1
	What was that?

		LI'L JOKER
	What was what?

		GIRL #1
	That silver thing.

		LI'L JOKER
	I didn't see no silver thing, and neither
	did you.

EXT. UNCLE ELROY'S STREET - CONTINUOUS

Craig, Day-Day and Roach are sneaking across the street
towards Joker's house.  Craig looks calm.  Day-Day looks
nervous.  Roach eats on a piece of baloney.

		DAY-DAY
	This ain't gonna work.  I'm going back.

Day-Day tries to turn around.  Craig grabs him.

		CRAIG
	It's about to work, just come on.

		ROACH
		(about to bite baloney)
	What about the dog?

Craig slaps the baloney out of his hand.

		CRAIG
	That's what the baloney's for!

All three kneel down next to a parked car.  Day-Day looks
sick.

		DAY-DAY
	Man, I don't think I can do this, Craig.
	I got the B-G's.

		CRAIG
	What's the B-G's?

		DAY-DAY
		(holding his stomach)
	The bubble guts.  I'm so nervous it feels
	like I'mma shit on myself.

		ROACH
	Try an' hold it, man.  Squeeze your ass
	cheeks together.

		DAY-DAY
	Butterflies, my ass.  I'm about to go
	home.

Craig grabs Day-Day again.

		CRAIG
	Look, Day-Day.  If we don't go over there
	and take a look, this might be the last
	night you got a home.  Now trust me.

Day-Day realizes that Craig is right. He takes a deep breath.

		CRAIG (cont'd)
	Now all we gotta do is find out where the
	little one put that pump.  Take it and
	see what's in it.

		DAY-DAY
	You make it sound so easy.

		CRAIG
	It is easy. You know why?  'Cause they're
	not expecting it.
	Now, Roach, you gotta occupy Cheeco.
	Long enough for me and Day-Day to take a
	good look.

		ROACH
	Dude, dogs hate me.  I don't know why.
	Me and K-9's just don't get along.

		CRAIG
	Well get along with this one.
		(pushing Roach)
	Go ahead of us.  Don't get seen and don't
	let that mutt out of your sight.

		ROACH
	Fuck, what's his name?

		CRAIG
	Cheeco.

Roach crawls away on his hands and knees.

EXT. JOKER'S HOUSE - NIGHT

Roach sneaks past Joker's lowrider.  He slowly approaches the
fence.  No sign of Cheeco.  Roach opens the pack of baloney
and pulls out a slice.

		ROACH
		(nervous whisper)
	Here, Cheeco.  Chee-co, here boy.  That's
	a good boy.

It's pitch-black behind the fence, still no Cheeco.

PARKED CAR - SAME TIME

Craig makes a move.

		CRAIG
	Come on, he should have'em by now.

Day-Day follows.

		DAY-DAY
	Hurry up.  He didn't have that much
	baloney.

They sneak up to the side of the house.  The MUSIC is
BLEEDING THROUGH the walls.

INSIDE HOUSE

Li'l Joker is dancing with all 3 girls.  They're all getting
high and feeling good.  One girl has come out of her blouse.
The others start to follow her lead.

		LI'L JOKER
		(yelling towards bedroom)
	Hey, homes, you guys better hurry up!
	I'mma get greedy.

BACK OUTSIDE

Craig and Day-Day are peeking through the window.  Craig
moves on.  Day-Day is still watching.

		DAY-DAY
		(to himself)
	Look at those tig-ole-bitties

Craig snatches him from the window.  They walk over to the
fence.

		CRAIG
	You go first.

		DAY-DAY
	Naw, you go first.

		CRAIG
	You go first.

		DAY-DAY
	No.

		CRAIG
	Day-Day, if you don't hop that fence
	I'mma throw you over.

		DAY-DAY
	I ain't scared of you.  We ain't little
	no more.

Day-Day gets ready to fight.

		CRAIG
	What?

Craig jumps like he's going to hit him.  Day-Day jumps back
and almost falls.

		DAY-DAY
	I hope to God that dog is happy.

		CRAIG
	Me too.

ROACH

...is having no luck.  Cheeco is nowhere to be found.  Roach
starts to sing.

		ROACH
	My baloney has a first name.  It's C-h-e-
	e-c-o.

We hear a MEAN GROWL out of the darkness.  Roach continues.

		ROACH (cont'd)
	My baloney has a second name it just like
	the first Cheeco.

GROWLING gets LOWDER.

		ROACH (cont'd)
	Ooooohhhh I love to eat it everyday if
	you ask me what I'll say.

We can hear TINY FOOTSTEPS RUNNING at Roach.

		ROACH (cont'd)
	Cheeco's got to be the dumbest fuckin'
	mutt in the whole wide U.S.A.

CHEECO is running at Roach full speed.  He jumps on the fence
and starts to BARK with everything he's got.  Roach drops the
baloney.

CRAIG AND DAY-DAY

...hear the DOG BARKING and freeze in their tracks.  Day-Day
tries to run.  Craig grabs him, again.

		CRAIG
	Wait.

		DAY-DAY
		(loud whisper)
	Wait for what?

A LOT of BARKING.  Nothing coming.

		CRAIG
	He's still over by Roach.

ROACH

...picks up the baloney and stuffs the whole pack into his
mouth.  CHEECO is SILENCED.  Roach is relieved.

INSIDE JOKER'S BEDROOM - CONTINUOUS

The chrome pump is open and filled with money.  Baby Joker's
pulling out the money while Joker sits on the bed counting
it.  They stop when they hear CHEECO BARKING.

		BABY JOKER
	Want me to take a look?

		JOKER
	No, keep working.

In the mirror behind Joker, we see a stick slide through the
curtain.  The curtain cracks just enough to see Craig's eye
looking in.

Just then, Li'l Joker bursts through the door with his shirt
off and two half-naked girls on his arms.

		LI'L JOKER
	Yo, man fuck that shit.  Do it later.
	It's Friday, time to party, SA.

		JOKER
	Close the door.

		LI'L JOKER
	Not until you come party with us, man.

Baby Joker looks at the girls, then at Joker.

		JOKER
	Alright, put it in that drawer.

Joker hands Baby Joker the money.  He puts it away.  They
start to exit the room.

OUTSIDE JOKER'S BEDROOM WINDOW - CONTINUOUS

Craig is still looking.  Day-Day is scared shitless.  He's
looking for Cheeco.

		DAY-DAY
		(whispering)
	What you see?

		CRAIG
	That pump was full of money.  I saw where
	they put it.  Stay right here, I'mma
	climb in and go get it.

		DAY-DAY
	Wait here?  So Cheeco can bite my ass
	off?  Tell me where it is I'll do it.

		CRAIG
	No, man, just wait.

Craig climbs in the window.  Day-Day holds his stomach.

		DAY-DAY
	I got the B-G's.

ROACH

... his meat supply is almost gone.  He tries to think fast.
Cheeco starts to look for more meat.  Roach grabs the smashed
brownie out of his pocket and throws it to Cheeco.  He
swallows it in one big gulp.  He's looking for more.  There
is no more.  Roach smiles.  CHEECO GROWLS.

		ROACH
	Good boy.  Nice dog.

CHEECO'S STILL GROWLING.  Suddenly Cheeco falls back on his
butt and lets out a slight moan.

CHEECO'S POV

Cheeco is looking up at Roach.  He's seeing double, even
triple.  Cheeco lays down.  It looks like he's faded.

		ROACH
	No lungs, baby.  No lungs.

INSIDE JOKER'S BEDROOM - CONTINUOUS

Craig is in.  The bedroom door is cracked.  Craig walks over
and shuts the door gently.  He locks it.  Then he creeps over
to the dresser.  He pulls out the pump and sets it on the
bed.  He opens it, revealing all the bundled-up money packed
in.  He starts to stuff it in his pockets.

OUTSIDE JOKER'S BEDROOM WINDOW - CONTINUOUS

Day-Day is trying to keep his composure.

INT. DEN - CONTINUOUS

The SA brothers are having a good time.  Joker is getting
nasty with one of the Girls.  He pulls her by the hand.

		GIRL #2
	No.

		JOKER
	Fuck that.

Joker picks her up and carries her to the bedroom.  She
screams.  He laughs.  He goes for the door.  It's locked.

		JOKER (cont'd)
	Who locked this door?

Everybody looks confused.

		JOKER (cont'd)
	Who locked this fuckin' door?!

Joker starts to kick the door.

INSIDE JOKER'S BEDROOM - CONTINUOUS

Craig hurries to put the pump back.  He's about to go for the
window when: BANG!  There's a KICK on the door.  All Craig
can do is go for another door on the other side of the room.
BANG!  The door flies open and Craig is out there just in
time.

		JOKER
	I don't want no doors locked around here.
	You hear me?

Joker walks in and hits the lights.  He throws the girl on
the bed.

		GIRL #2
	Oh, poppy, I like it rough.

		JOKER
		(taking off shirt)
	Good, 'cause that's how you gonna get it.

INT. JOKER'S HOUSE - STAIRWAY - CONTINUOUS

Baby Joker has his back turned when we see Craig sprint
behind him and up the stairs.  Baby Joker turns around.  He
thinks he saw something.  He slowly starts to walk up the
stairs.

		LI'L JOKER
	Karla!

INT. KARLA'S ROOM - CONTINUOUS

Karla is in her room working out.  Craig runs in.  He's
shocked to see her.  She doesn't see him, but he's frozen.
Then she turns around and he startles her.

		KARLA
	What are you doing?

Think fast, Craig.

		CRAIG
	Huh?

		KARLA
	What are you doing here?

		CRAIG
	I hope you don't think I'm crazy, but I
	just had to come in here and show you I
	ain't scared of yo' punk ass
	brothers...and you wouldn't have be
	scared of 'em neither if you had a man
	like me in yo' life.

		KARLA
	What??  So you snuck in my room to tell
	me that?

		CRAIG
	Yes I did.  Excuse me.

Her door flies open.  Smashing Craig behind it.  It's Li'l
Joker.

		LI'L JOKER
	Who you talking to?

Craig looks nervous.

		KARLA
	Nobody.

		LI'L JOKER
	I heard a voice.

		KARLA
	No you didn't.  Get out my room.  Go back
	down to your little girlfriends.

Karla pushes Li'l Joker out.

OUTSIDE JOKER'S BEDROOM WINDOW - CONTINUOUS

Day-Day is having a fit.

		GIRL #2 (O.S.)
	Shut the window.

		JOKER (O.S.)
	You shut the window.

She does.

		DAY-DAY
	Oh shit.

Day-Day takes off.  He hops the fence in record speed.

CHEECO

...is laying on his back looking through the fence.  He's
calm and cool now.

OTHER SIDE

Roach is on his back looking through the fence.  He hits a
joint and blows the smoke into Cheeco's face.

		ROACH
	...like I was saying.  A guy like me, and
	a dog like you, don't need this bullshit.
	We need to be in Maui renting jet ski to
	fat funks in flower shirts.  You feel me,
	C?

Cheeco is passed out.  Day-Day sneaks around the corner.  He
whispers.

		DAY-DAY
	Roach...Roach, come on.

		ROACH
	Where's Craig?

		DAY-DAY
	He's inside the house?

		ROACH
	Why did he go in the house?

		DAY-DAY
	Don't worry about it.  We gotta figure
	out a way to get Craig out of there.
	He's probably getting tied up now.

INT. KARLA'S ROOM - CONTINUOUS

Craig is sweating.  Karla is standing in front of him.

		KARLA
	You did all this for me?

		CRAIG
	Most of it.  I just hate to see you in
	this situation.

		KARLA
	Thanks for noticing.  It used ta be
	peaceful before they got out.  Took over
	the house and caused my mother's nervous
	breakdown.

		CRAIG
	Why didn't she put'em out?

		KARLA
	Easier said than done.  We saved up to
	get away from them, but they followed us.

		CRAIG
	I'm sorry to hear that.

Craig walks over to the window.

		CRAIG (cont'd)
	Can I get out this way?

Karla walks up behind him, looking very sexy.

		KARLA
	I thought you came up here to see me.

Craig turns around.

		CRAIG
	I did.  Is that door locked?

		KARLA
	It's locked.

		CRAIG
	Make sure.

Karla turns around to check the door.

		KARLA
	You so nervous, I already locked this
	door.

Craig drops a thick roll of money into her purse.  She shakes
the knob.

		KARLA (cont'd)
	See.  All locked.

She walks over to him.  They're face-to-face.

		KARLA (cont'd)
	What's your hurry?

		CRAIG
	I got my cousin Day-Day waiting for me.

		KARLA
		(getting even closer)
	So what?  Let's make'em wait.

Craig looks AT the CAMERA.

		CRAIG
	I be damn.

EXT. JOKER'S HOUSE - NIGHT

Day-Day and Roach are at Joker's front door.

		DAY-DAY
	You wanna knock?

		ROACH
	Go for it.

Day-Day knocks real soft.  Too soft.

		ROACH (cont'd)
	No one's gonna hear that.  The music's
	playing.

		DAY-DAY
	'Scuse me, partner, but that's a ghetto
	knock.

		ROACH
	This is a knock.

Roach starts to kick on the door with his foot.  It's very
loud.

INT. DEN - CONTINUOUS

Joker storms in with the AK.  Li'l Joker is in the corner
with his girl, and Baby Joker is on the floor.  Joker TURNS
DOWN THE STEREO.

		JOKER
	You fuckin' lover boys hear that?

		BABY JOKER
	Hear what?

The KNOCKING continues.  Li'l Joker and Baby Joker push the
girls aside and jump up.  Li'l Joker grabs a big knife.  Baby
Joker grabs a 9mm.  Joker looks at the girls.

		JOKER
	Don't fuckin' move.

They won't.  The brothers run to the door.

OUTSIDE

Roach is still kicking.

		DAY-DAY
	What's wrong with you, fool.  Stop
	kicking their door.  They might think we
	the police.

The front door swings open and before we know it.  Day-Day's
got an AK pointed in his face, and Roach is looking at a 9
close up.

		JOKER
	What the fuck you want?

Day-Day's tongue doesn't work.

		DAY-DAY
	Uh...um...I mean uh, can we borrow a cup
	of sugar?

		JOKER
	What?!  This look like a 7-11 or
	something?  Get the fuck outta here!

		DAY-DAY
		(starts to leave)
	Alright, no problem.  We gone.

		ROACH
	Hold on.  A man, you broke my fuckin'
	board and I don't appreciate it.

Immediately Day-Day and Roach are snatched inside the house,
and the door is SLAMMED.

EXT. UNCLE ELROY'S HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

Mr. Jones' dog truck pulls to a stop.  He gets out and runs
to the house.  He KNOCKS.  Uncle Elroy answers.  Suga is
looking over his shoulder.

		MR. JONES
	I got your message.  Where's Craig?

		UNCLE ELROY
	I don't know, I didn't leave you no damn
	message!

		MR. JONES
	You didn't call the Sandwich Joint with a
	urgent message?

		UNCLE ELROY
	Hell naw, Willie. Them fleas and tics
	must be sucking on yo' brain!

		MR. JONES
	Somebody left me a message.  Well where's
	Craig and Day-Day?

		UNCLE ELROY
	I don't know.  Suga, go ask Miss Ho Kym
	if she seen them.

EXT. KARLA'S BEDROOM WINDOW - CONTINUOUS

Craig is about to climb out the window.

		KARLA
	Next time, page me first.

		CRAIG
	Okay.

Craig climbs out the window.  He loses his footing and free
falls into some bushes.

		KARLA
	You alright?

		CRAIG
	Yeah, I'm cool.  See you later.

He runs past a sleeping Cheeco and hops the fence.  Free at
last.  He's about to run back across the street when he sees
the dog truck.

		CRAIG (cont'd)
	What is he doing here?

Craig ducks back.

INT. JOKER'S HOUSE - DEN - NIGHT

Day-Day and Roach are sitting on a couch looking nervous.
The Joker brothers hold guns on them.  The three half-dressed
Mexican Girls look a bit scared themselves.

		DAY-DAY
	Look, man, this is a big
	misunderstanding.  All we wanted to do is
	borrow some sugar.

		ROACH
	And some rolling papers.

		DAY-DAY
	...and some rolling papers, that's it.
	We didn't mean to mess up y'all get
	together or nothing.
		(to the Girls)
	How y'all doing?

They answer --

		GIRLS
	Fine.

		DAY-DAY
	That's good.  My name's Day-Day and this
	is my friend, Roach.

		ROACH
		(waving)
	Hey.

		DAY-DAY
	Ya'll live around here?

		JOKER
	Shut up!  Both of you right now!

		DAY-DAY
		(to Roach)
	Shhhh!  Roach, shut the fuck up.

		JOKER
	I don't believe this sugar shit.
	Something ain't right.

Joker thinks for a moment.  Then he turns to Baby Joker.

		JOKER (cont'd)
		(in Spanish)
	Go check on the money.

Baby Joker obeys the order.

		LI'L JOKER
	Here comes Karla, put the guns away.

		JOKER
	Keep your mouth shut.

Karla walks back in.

		KARLA
	Hey, what's going on?

		JOKER
	Nothing.  What you want?

		KARLA
	Are you going to take me to see Mom?

		JOKER
	Take your car.

		KARLA
	'Take your car?'

		JOKER
	Yeah, and hurry up.

Karla doesn't believe it.

		KARLA
	Okay.

She grabs the keys off the bar.

		KARLA (cont'd)
	I'll be back in a bit.  'Bye.

She's out the door.  Joker turns to Day-Day and Roach.

		JOKER
	If everything's alright.  We might let
	you leave, too.

EXT. UNCLE ELROY'S HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

The front door swings open.  It's Uncle Elroy.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Craig, where the hell you been?

Mr. Jones pops up.  So does Suga and Miss Ho Kym.

		MR. JONES
	Hold up, Elroy, that's my boy.  Craig,
	what the hell wrong with you?  Where you
	been?

		CRAIG
	Have you seen Day-Day?

		UNCLE ELROY
	No.  Thought he was with you.

		CRAIG
	Daddy, Uncle Elroy, I need your help.

He steps in the house and closes the door behind him.

INT. JOKER'S HOUSE - DEN - NIGHT

It's the same scene as before.  Two angry Mexicans, three
half-naked Girls, plus Day-Day and Roach in the middle.  Baby
Joker returns.

		BABY JOKER
		(in Spanish)
	Some of the money is missing.

		JOKER
		(upset)
	What?!?!

		DAY-DAY
	What?!
		(as he looks at Roach)
	What that mean?

		ROACH
	I don't know.

		JOKER
	It means you Miyateas are staying with
	us.
		(to Baby Joker)
	Get the duct tape.
		(to Li'l Joker)
	You know what to do.

Li'l Joker turns to the girls.

		LI'L JOKER
	Put your clothes back on.

The scared Girls start to dress.

EXT. JOKER'S HOUSE - NIGHT

Karla backs up the rider and she's out.  The Joker house
looks quiet.  Then the door opens and three Girls walk out.

		LI'L JOKER
	Sorry you gotta walk, but I'll call you
	tomorrow.

The Girls take off down the street.  The porch lights go out.

INT. UNCLE ELROY'S HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

Craig, Mr. Jones, Uncle Elroy, Suga and Miss Ho Kym are
peeking out the window.

		CRAIG
	You see that?

		MR. JONES
	I saw it.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Me, too.  You think they're in there?

		CRAIG
	Yup.

		MISS HO KYM
	Why for?  Them boys are real player
	haters.

		CRAIG
	It's a long story.  Right now we gotta do
	somethin'.

		MR. JONES
	You come way out here to get into more
	trouble.  You could've stayed at home.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Willie, shut up.  Yo' old ass need to get
	in a little bit o' trouble sometimes.

		MR. JONES
		(rolling up his sleeve)
	Don't get it twisted, Elroy.  I ain't
	lost none of my street skills.

		SUGA
	If ya'll don't come back not in ten
	minutes, I'mma callin' the po'lice.

Craig, Uncle Elroy and Mr. Jones are about to go on a
mission.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Wait a minute.  I gotta go get my shit.

Uncle Elroy runs upstairs.

INT. JOKER'S HOUSE - DEN - CONTINUOUS

Li'l Joker is almost finished duct-taping Day-Day and Roach.
Baby Joker holds the AK.  Joker paces the floor.  Day-Day and
Roach try to make peace by singing an old "War" song.  Day-
Day is serious.

		DAY-DAY & ROACH
	'Why can't we be friends?  Why can't we
	be friends?  Why can't we be friends?
	Why can't we be friends?'...

		DAY-DAY
		(still singing)
	'I hope my cousin call the C.I.A.'

Joker throws a BOTTLE against the wall.  It SHATTERS into a
million pieces.

		JOKER
	Shut the fuck up!

The singing stops.

		JOKER (cont'd)
	If you don't tell me where my money is,
	I'mma show you how close we can get.

		DAY-DAY
	Money?  Man, we came over here from some
	sugar and rolling papers.  We was going
	to get high, and I was going to show this
	white boy how to make Kool-Aid.  That's
	all.

		ROACH
	Hey, mister Joker, have a heart, bro.
	It's Friday.

Joker walks over to Roach and kicks him in the mouth.

		JOKER
	I'm hearing a lot of talking, but I'm not
	hearing the right words.

		BABY JOKER
	Maybe the other guy took it.

		DAY-DAY
	Why would he take it?  He don't even know
	you.

		JOKER
		(thinking)
	Shut up!  Where's that other miyatea?

EXT. JOKER'S HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

Uncle Elroy catches up with Craig and Mr. Jones on the side
of Joker's house.  He has a big chrome .357 magnum.

		CRAIG
	That's a nice piece of heat right there.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Thank you.  I only got two bullets in the
	mothafucka, but it's better than nothing.

		MR. JONES
	Two bullets?  Yo' ass ain't changed.
	Back in the day, all I had was a stick.

		CRAIG
	Come on.

They sneak over to the fence.

		UNCLE ELROY
	What about that ugly dog?

		MR. JONES
	I got my mase.

		CRAIG
	He's on the other side, sleep.

They start to hop the fence.

ON CHEECO

...starts to awake.  He tries to stand up and stumbles back
on his face.  He lets out ANOTHER MOAN.

ON CRAIG AND UNCLE ELROY

Craig is over the fence.  Mr. Jones is over  But Uncle Elroy
is having a little trouble.

		CRAIG (cont'd)
	Need some help?

		MR. JONES
	Need to lose some weight.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Shut yo' ass up.

Uncle Elroy falls off the fence.

		UNCLE ELROY (cont'd)
	Damn.

Craig & Mr. Jones helps him up.  They creep over to the
window - the shades are pulled down.

		CRAIG
	I'm not sure, but I think they're in this
	room.

INT. JOKER'S HOUSE - DEN - CONTINUOUS

Joker is getting tired of the games.  And Day-Day is pleading
for his life.

		JOKER
	Tape his mouth shut.

		DAY-DAY
	Joker, a man like yourself can do a lot
	for this community.  By letting us go,
	you can improve black and brown
	relations.

		ROACH
	Yeah, brown and white relations, too.

Day-Day looks at Roach.

		DAY-DAY
	Boy, you gonna get us killed.

Li'l Joker grabs Day-Day and tapes his mouth shut.  He does
the same to Roach.

		JOKER
	I'm sick and tired of bullshitting with
	you guys.
		(in Spanish)
	Baby brother, go get the chainsaw.

Baby Joker hands him the AK and he's gone.  Day-Day and Roach
look terrified.  Everything has turned serious.

INT. MR. JONES' DOG TRUCK - CONTINUOUS

Debo and Ezal are still asleep.  Debo wakes first.

		DEBO
	Ezal!  Ezal!

		EZAL
	Huh?

		DEBO
	We must be here 'cause we stopped.

		EZAL
	Good, let's get out.

They both try to get out.  But it's no way to get out from
the inside.

		DEBO
	Hey, how you get out of here.

		EZAL
	I don't know.

They both start to go nuts on the door.

OUTSIDE

The dog truck is shaking like crazy.

EXT. JOKER'S BACKYARD - CONTINUOUS

Baby Joker walks out the back door.  He stops in the middle
of the yard.

		BABY JOKER
	Cheeco!  Cheeco!  Here, boy!

No Cheeco.  He continues to a shed in the back yard.  He goes
inside and picks up a chainsaw.  On his way out the shed,
he's slapped in the face with a "Big Ass Stick."  Mr. Jones
is working the handle.

Baby Joker is out cold.  Mr. Jones stands over him.

		MR. JONES
	Nigga, you got knock the fuck out.

		CRAIG
	Yeah, pops!

		UNCLE ELROY
	Damn, big bro.  You swung that like Sammy
	Sosa.

		MR. JONES
	The skills are still intact.  Now tie his
	ass up, Elroy.

He does.

INT. JOKER'S HOUSE - DEN - CONTINUOUS

The terror continues.

		JOKER
	My little brother went out to get my
	chainsaw.  I'mma show you what happens to
	fools who don't tell me what I wanna
	hear.  You ever see Scarface, mothafucka?

Day-Day starts to cry.  Roach tries to scream through the
tape.  Joker turns to Li'l Joker.

		JOKER (cont'd)
	Go see what's taking him so long.

Li'l Joker obeys.  We FOLLOW Li'l Joker THROUGH the house and
OUT the back door.

EXT. JOKER'S BACKYARD - CONTINUOUS

Li'l Joker stands at the back door.

		LI'L JOKER
	Junior?!  Junior?!

No answer.  Suddenly he spots something over by the shed.
It's Baby Joker all ties up.

		LI'L JOKER (cont'd)
	What the...

He runs to the rescue.  But right before he gets to him,
Uncle Elroy jumps out the bushes and takes him.  "Ronnie Lott
Style."  Mr. Jones steps in with the stick.  Craig steps in
with the rope, and it's over.  Uncle Elroy's hurt.  It's his
back.

		UNCLE ELROY
		(in pain)
	My back.

		MR. JONES
	What's the matter?

		UNCLE ELROY
	I slip my disc, again... Oh got damn.

Craig goes to assist Uncle Elroy.

		CRAIG
	Stretch it out.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Don't move me.

INT. JOKER'S HOUSE - DEN - CONTINUOUS

Joker is pissed.

		JOKER
	Where are these fucking guys?

He storms out the room.  Day-Day and Roach try to escape.
They flap around on the ground like a fish out of water.

EXT. JOKER'S BACKYARD - CONTINUOUS

The back door flies open.  Joker appears with the AK-47 in
hand.  He spots Uncle Elroy in the middle of the yard bent
over.  He lifts the AK.

		JOKER
	What you doing here?

		UNCLE ELROY
	I lost something, nigga.  What it look
	like?

		JOKER
	Looks like a dead man.

Out of nowhere, Craig hits Joker from the back.  He flies one
way and the gun flies another.  Now it's really on!  Hand-to-
hand combat.  Craig vs. Joker.  Right vs. wrong.  Good vs.
evil.  You know how it go.

		MR. JONES
	Go to the body, Craig!  Go to the body!

INT. JOKER'S HOUSE - DEN - CONTINUOUS

Day-Day and Roach have made it a little further to the door,
but they still look like fish searching for H2O.  Uncle Elroy
stumbles in.  He grabs a knife and starts to cut them loose.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Boy, Day-Day, I'mma kick yo' ass for
	getting me into this mess and hurting my
	back!  I moved out here to get away from
	this kinda shit!

EXT. JOKER'S BACKYARD - CONTINUOUS

Fight's still on.  Craig is giving Joker the ass-whipping he
deserves when Uncle Elroy, Day-Day and Roach reach the back
porch.

		DAY-DAY
	Get 'em, Craig!

		ROACH
	Bite his ear!

		UNCLE ELROY
	What 'em!  Watch 'em!

Joker takes a few more shots from Craig, then grabs Craig
around the waist and slams him to the ground.  Craig is hurt.

		UNCLE ELROY (cont'd)
	Get off yo' back, Craig!

Craig struggles with Joker, who now has the devil in his
eyes.

		CRAIG
	Ya'll mothafuckas help me!

Day-Day and Roach look at each other.  They rush to Craig's
aide.  Joker spots them coming, he also spots the AK.

In SLOW MOTION, Day-Day and Roach dive on Joker...at the same
time Joker dives for the AK.  Day-Day and Roach land on top
of Craig and our trio try to hurry to their feet.  But as
soon as they get up, they're looking down the barrel of an AK-
47.

		JOKER
		(smiling)
	Say hello to my little friend.

BOOM!

Debo hits Joker from the back.  Joker is out cold.

		DEBO
	No way, Jose.  This one is mine.

Ezal picks up the gun and hands it to Debo.

		DEBO (cont'd)
	Hi, Craig, remember me?

Craig knows he can't fight a gun.  Everybody is helpless.  We
can hear SIRENS getting CLOSER and CLOSER.  Suddenly, out of
nowhere...

CHEECO!

The pitbull is back!  And he's mad as hell.  He runs through
everybody and jumps on Debo, knocking the gun from his hand.
Craig and Day-Day jump on Debo.  Roach WHISTLES, and Cheeco
stops his attack on Debo.

Cheeco runs over to Roach and jumps in his arms.  Roach's
being licked to death by the pitbull.

		DAY-DAY
	Finally you got a bitch, huh, Roach?

		ROACH
	He's a boy, dude.

EXT. JOKER'S HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

Out front, three sheriff cars swoop into the driveway.  The
cops jump out, guns drawn.

EXT. JOKER'S BACKYARD - CONTINUOUS

Debo and Ezal are tied up next to the Jokers.

		EZAL
	Mr. Jones, we was just playin'.  He made
	me do it.

Mr. Jones don't wanna hear it.  Craig runs into the house.
Uncle, Day-Day, Roach and Cheeco look at the five on the
ground...it's over, or is it?

		SHERIFF #3
	Freeze, Sheriff's Department!

The SHERIFFS are on our heroes, guns drawn.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Wait a minute!  I live across the street!

		SHERIFF LADY
	You do?

		UNCLE ELROY
	Yeah.  Paid cash.

		DAY-DAY
	They the ones you want.

EXT. UNCLE ELROY'S STREET - CONTINUOUS

Red and Blue lights flash through the neighborhood.  Everyone
is out their door looking at the action.  The suburbs is
starting to look like the ghetto for real.

Uncle Elroy is bent over.

		UNCLE ELROY
	When my back gets better I'mma beat the
	black off you, Day-Day.

		DAY-DAY
	I know.  I'm sorry.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Sorry, my ass.

Suga and Miss Ho Kym come running.

		SUGA
	Elroy, what happen?

		UNCLE ELROY
	I threw my back, again.

		SUGA
	Aw, no lovin' tonight?

		UNCLE ELROY
	Naw, baby, no lovin' tonight.

		SUGA
	Come on, baby, let's go in the house.

		UNCLE ELROY
	For what?  We ain't gonna have no house
	after the auction tomorrow!

Everyone is sad.

		ROACH
	Don't worry, bro, you, Suga, Day-Day and
	Craig can live with me and my parents.
	'Til you get back on yo' feet.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Thanks, Roach, but I can't accept that.
	We're moving back to Watts where it's
	safe.

		DAY-DAY
	Where's Craig?

		UNCLE ELROY
	I don't know.

		MR. JONES
	That boy just don't never learn.

EXT. JOKER'S HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

Craig steps out of Joker's front door carrying the chrome
hydraulic pump.

		CRAIG
	I love Fridays.

He walks past the cops and crosses the street.

		ROACH
	There he go.

		MR. JONES
	What the hell is he carrying?

		DAY-DAY
	Property taxes, and a new candy-apple
	paint job.

They greet Craig and all start to walk towards the house.

INT. UNCLE ELROY'S STREET - NIGHT

The "Jefferson's" theme song, "Movin' On Up," PLAYS on the
TV.  Uncle Elroy is face down on the floor looking at the TV.
Miss Ho Kym walks on his back with her shoes off.  He moans
in pleasure.  Mr. Jones eats chicken wings.

		MR. JONES
	Jump up and down on him.

		MISS HO KYM
	That's next.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Don't listen to him.  How much we got?

Suga is at the table counting money.  She takes a few
hundreds for herself.

		SUGA
	We got forty-seven thousand, three
	hundred and fifteen dollars.

		MR. JONES
	Good Lord.

		MISS HO KYM
	That's a whole lot of scrilla.

		UNCLE ELROY
	It's gonna feel good to pay my taxes.

Craig is tending to his wounds.

		CRAIG
	You're welcome, Unc.

		DAY-DAY
	What about me?

		UNCLE ELROY
	You didn't do nothing.

Roach and Cheeco are about to leave.  He has a handful of
money.

		ROACH
	Hey, guys, I'm outta here.

		DAY-DAY
	Thanks for the help.

		ROACH
	Hey, man, the pleasure's all mine.
	Thanks for the dog, and the money.  Maybe
	my dad won't kick my ass tonight.

		DAY-DAY
	Call me.

		ROACH
	Okay, later, bro.  Hey, Craig, nice
	smokin' wit'cha.

		CRAIG
	You too.

		MR. JONES
	Smokin' what?

		CRAIG
	Nothing.

		ROACH
	Later, Mr. Jones.  Bye, Suga.

		ALL
	Bye, Roach.

Roach is gone.  Day-Day shuts the door.  Miss Ho Kym is
finished.  She steps off of Uncle Elroy.

		MISS HO KYM
	All done.  Stand up.

Uncle Elroy gets up.  He's better.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Hey, that George Jefferson shit works.
	Thanks, Miss Kym.

Uncle Elroy walks over to the table and grabs a stack of
hundred-dollar bills.  He hands it to Miss Ho Kym.

		MISS HO KYM
	I can't accept.

		UNCLE ELROY
	You better take this money.

She takes the money.

		MISS HO KYM
		(in Korean)
	Thank you.
		(in English)
	I can take a trip back to Korea now.
	Find a freak daddy, bring him back to
	America.  Make 'em my bitch.

		SUGA
	You go, girl.

Uncle Elroy helps Miss Ho Kym out the door.

		MR. JONES
	Well, we better hit the road, too.
	Craig, get your stuff.

		UNCLE ELROY
	Well, Craig, you're welcome anytime.

Suga hugs Craig.

		SUGA
	Yeah, baby, it's a shame you leavin'.
	Aunt Suga gonna miss yo.

And the others have to agree.

		DAY-DAY
	You sure you don't wanna stay?

		CRAIG
	Naw, I'm got live ghetto fabulous.  make
	sure you get that car fixed.

		DAY-DAY
	I will.  When can I come visit?

		CRAIG
	I don't know.  Probably next Friday.

They're out the door.

EXT. UNCLE ELROY'S HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

As we PULL BACK, all is well inside and outside Uncle Elroy's
house.  The suburbs are back to normal.  They get in the car.
Craig looks over at the Joker's house.

ANGLE ON JOKER'S HOUSE

Karla pulls up in the low-rider.  They lock eyes and she
blows him a kiss.  He gives her a wink.  They pull off.  She
goes in the house.

		CRAIG (V.O.)
	Well, all's well that ends well.  Another
	Friday gone.  Another problem solved.
	It's a trip to know that things can get
	crazy in the suburbs, too.  I can't wait
	to get back home...to the peace and quiet
	streets of South Central.

D'Wana's car pulls INTO FRAME.  She stops in front of Uncle
Elroy's house.  Baby'D jumps out with a brick.  She throws it
through the back window of Day-Day's BMW.  She jumps back in
and they're gone...

						   THE END.



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